Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Honey Bee

Judges chapters 4-5 talk about Sisera, Barak, Deberah, and Jael. Normally this would not be a chapter that would completely stand out in my mind. However, several years ago my brother gave me some CDs titled "Follow the Rabbi" by Ray Vander Laan. When you break down the meanings of the names listed in these chapters, the meaning takes on a whole new idea.

Deborah- Honey Bee
Sisera- Snake
Barak- Lightning
Jael- Yahweh is God

Now look at the lives and use these names. Lightning asked Honey Bee to go into battle with him against Snake. "Very well," she replied, "I will go with you. But since you have made this choice, you will receive no honor. For the LORD's victory over Sisera will be at the hands of a woman." So Lightning went into battle against Snake and defeated his troops. Meanwhile, Snake ran into the tent of Yahweh is God. As he laid down to rest Yahweh is God drove a tent peg right through Snake's temple into the ground and so he died.

Isn't this just awesome. If anyone had been paying attention to the names and what they meant they would have known so much more about what was going to happen. Genesis 3:15, God curses Satan and said, "From now on, you and the woman will be enemies, and your offspring and her offspring will be enemies. He will crush your head, and you will strike his heel." If Sisera had known history and known what his name stood for he would have never tried to find refuge in the house of a woman whose name was Yahweh is God.



Monday, March 30, 2009

Roads Traveled

I am sitting in my class where I am going to be the substitute teacher for the week. I am faced with our society and where it is headed every day. While we do have wonderful children and a pretty sheltered atmosphere here, up in the middle of the mountains, life around all of us is changing. And yet, is it changing or are we just going in a circle that has been here before? I have been reading the Old Testament and I have to say that we are going in a circle that has been traveled upon before.

We are a country that has tasted the sweet fruit of the promise land which was conquered by those who passed before us. Deut. 6:11, "When you have eaten your fill in this land, be careful not to forget the LORD." Our society is doing exactly what He warned others not to do. We are forgetting our LORD, the One who is true and the true leader of this world. When we continually turn against Him, why are we surprised when He turns us over to our own wishes. In Judges we see that the people continually turned against God and did what was evil in His sight. Instead, "the people did whatever seemed right in their own eyes." We have a tendency to believe that we are the first ones to think a certain way about whatever issue, but in reality we are just copying an old thought in a new day. Each of us have a path that we must travel on our own, but in reality it is a path that has been traveled before. The main thing that we need to do is to learn to look at the lives that have gone down our path and see where they did thing right and see where they made mistakes.

Jason is a very wise man, for he looked at others lives and what they experienced. He looked at others and calculated his next move based on what he saw. I, on the other hand, was not wise with my life. I jumped without ever considering the choices that I was making. I wish that I could talk to others and warn them and they would actually take heed for what is ahead. But in reality I do not need to warn anyone. Everything that anyone needs to know is written down for them to see. Times have not changed. Technology is different, but human nature is the same. Life will give many a very hard lesson to learn, and that lesson is heartache. Others will not have to experience things the same, but all of us combined are determining the path for future generations.

When you think you are the only one who has traveled down a certain road, look into history, this will open your eyes to the truth. What happened to those who traveled down this same road?

Friday, March 27, 2009

Personal Character

Yesterday was a very hard day for me. I spent the day in tears and anger. God is continually working on me and when I feel Him calling me to another level, I usually start in anger. My first reaction is always anger, I want to battle. After the fight and anger are visible in my own eyes, then the tears come. My oldest brother is continually steeped in God's word, so godly wisdom comes from him. Do you know, how I hate this. It is hard when someone talks to you and in everything you are doing, you are trying to do it the right way, but then someone talks to you from the very word of God and they reveal to you that you are actually in the wrong. How I hate this and since I hate it so much, anger is my first reaction. I truly desire to be a godly woman, who has it all right. I want wisdom, I want to be good and I want to be the one helping others, but in this quest, it is constantly being revealed to me that I have such a long way to go myself. I will never get there, no one will ever get there. That is the beauty of it all, God in His wisdom, keeps us humble by never allowing us to have it all right.

In my daily reading, I am in Judges. Abimelech is probably someone whom you have never heard of or don't remember hearing about. His desire was power and his desire only continued to increase as time went by, until he slaughtered all 70 of his brothers. Nothing but death could satisfy his thirst for this power.
In Oswald Chambers 'My Utmost for His Highest', this morning reads, "A higher state of mind and spiritual vision can only be achieved through the higher practice of personal character. If you live up to the highest and best that you know in the outer level of your life, God will continually say to you, 'Friend, come up even higher.'" Then he goes on to tell us to look at our life one year ago to this week and see where we were compared to now. My title for my blog entry one year ago is "War that Rages Within", now isn't that just lovely. "Never allow God to show you a truth which you do not instantly begin to live up to, applying it to your life. Always work through it, staying in its light."
In our small group study we are reading "Our Secret Paradise" by Jimmy Evans. In this we are reading about marriage and how each of us is to be like Christ in our marriage. God has called us to a higher standard and He has given each of us roles and jobs in our marriage for us to fulfill.

In saying all of this, my brother informed me yesterday that I was not fulfilling the role that I was called to fulfill with my mother. I am called by God to honor my father and mother. This is my role as their child, but every time I talk with my mother, we fight. We have an intense love for each other, but we get in an argument every time we talk. I usually sit and say that 'if she would just step back and let me make my own decisions, then I would not have to defend myself and we would not fight.' You see, I put the blame on her and her need to change. Yesterday was a very hard day for me. All of the studying that I am doing, in everything it is me that has to do the changing. I keep telling God that I have done so much changing, when is it someone else's turn and I can relax? He let me know that I am never to relax, but to come up higher. He is constantly calling me to a higher level.

In every study that I am doing, I was not combining them to the other areas of my life. I am seeing my role as a wife. My husband and I both feel that we have a pretty good marriage. I have a glimpse of the call on my life from God, and I feel I am doing every thing I can to obey Him in that call. But there was this one place that I hadn't been willing to let go of, and it was with my relationship with my mother. I have this desire to have power over my life, and it seemed to me that she was still trying to control it for me. So in turn, I get mad and defend my right as an adult, but this is not what God has called me to do. "Honor your father and your mother." He never says that when you are old, you no longer have to honor your parents. He only says to honor them, so fighting with my mother is never okay, no matter how old I get.

It is hard when in everything that I am called to do, I am to submit. I want to be in control and have the power over something, but in every area He calls me to submit. In this submission I am learning that no one has any power, nor are they supposed to. God is the only one with any right and He is the only one with any power. Submission is my role; power can never be my goal. He calls me to walk as Christ walked, His walk was a servant spirit. I am called to serve Him and all others in my life. Power is never a servants attitude. Oh, how hard this can be, and yet here is where freedom rests.

"Mom, I am sorry that I have not given you the honor that you deserve. I have battled with you, my entire life. I am so sorry for this. My life has consisted of heartache after heartache, and I am so sorry. I have not given you the honor that you deserve and He tells us, this is the way to life a life full of blessings. I believe that one of the reasons that I have not lived the life that He desired for me is directly related to the dishonor that I have shown to you. I am truly sorry. I will do better and our relationship will mend, because I will change. I love you..."

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Consequences

Since the beginning of creation, God has desired to love us and for us to love Him. He has wanted to bless His children and for them to understand His love for them. But from the beginning, His children have been rebellious. They have not loved Him as He desires and we have continually turned against Him. In turn we have continually turned against His blessings. With every action that we make, there is a consequence that comes with it. The awesome thing is that we have every consequence written before us. We can choose life or we can choose death, either way it is our choice.

Deuteronomy 27 is the beginning of the final chapters of this book. This is where Moses lays out, in plain view, the consequences of obedience and disobedience. There are certain conditions that we must meet in order to get the full blessings from God. If we choose to turn our backs on Him there are consequences for our choice. "If you fully obey the LORD our God by keeping all of the commands I am giving you... You will experience all these blessings if you obey the LORD your God: ...But if you refuse to listen to the LORD your God and do not obey all the commands and laws I am giving you today, all these curses will come and overwhelm you: ...Let none of those who hear the warnings of this curse consider themselves immune, thinking, 'I am safe, even though I am walking in my own stubborn way,' This would lead to utter ruin!" In the greatness of God, He allows us to choose. In everything that I teach my boys, consequences for what they choose, is one of the most important. No one makes me act in a sinful way, it is my choice and it is yours.

I could very easily play the victim, because of my past. I could still be blaming my ex husband for everything that went wrong. Do you know how easily it would be to say that it was all his fault. He was the one who was supposed to protect me, and yet he sent me out in order to fulfill his own sinful desires. Trust me, I could very easily play the victim. But where is there life in the slavery of victimization. No, we each choose what we do and how we act. My ex husband is no more responsible for my actions than I am for yours. God in His mighty power has given us the freedom to choose. In that freedom there was a time when I chose death, even to the point of a knives at my wrist, but now I choose life. I choose life because I choose Him. When we choose Him, in the consequences of our choice to obey Him, He brings life. It is all part of consequences.

Deut 30, "Suppose all these things happen to you- the blessings and the curses I have listed- and you meditate on them... If at that time you return to the LORD your God, and you and your children begin wholeheartedly to obey all the commands I have given you today, then the LORD your God will go and find you and bring you back again... The LORD your God will cleanse your heart and the hearts of all your descendants so that you will love Him with all your heart and soul, and so you may live! ...The LORD your God will delight in you if you obey His voice and keep the commands and laws written in the Book of the Law, and if you turn to the LORD your God with all your heart and soul. This command I am giving you today is not too difficult for you to understand or perform... The message is very close at hand; it is on your lips and in your heart so that you can obey it. Now listen! Today I am giving you a choice between prosperity and disaster, between life and death... Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, that you and your descendants might live! Choose to love the LORD your God and obey Him and commit yourself to Him, for His is your life."

There was a time when I chose death, I now choose life. I choose to love my LORD and in loving Him, I obey Him and in this, I choose life. I choose life! What are your choices? What are the consequences that you are choosing? Choose this day to serve the LORD. Choose life so that you may live! Jesus did not come and die on the cross to make you holy. He did not come to make bad paople good. He came to make dead people live!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Path to Humility

It is truly amazing to me, how much I learn new about God through His word, every day. I am so thankful that Jason signed us up to read the entire bible by August. It has given me direction in my study, and anyone who knows me, knows that I need a little direction. I have been struggling with my past for some time now. I have been dealing with the question of when I was saved? It has been very hard for me. You see, I was raised in the church; I was baptized when I was 12; I graduated high school from a private Christian school; I attended a mission program for one year after graduation, where I studied the bible every day; I graduated college from a private Christian University. I had all of the right credentials, I would even say that I loved God. I did love Him, I just didn't know how to let go of myself. So this has been a burning question with my heart for the past 7 years. When was I saved? Was I saved, then left salvation, then returned again? What are my answers? I am finally feeling a little better and it is because of my reading of the Old Testament. If anyone ever tells you that you don't need to look into the Old Testament, because now we live in the New, I am sorry, they are wrong. It is all the living word, relevant to today, to me right now.

I clicked on Ravi Zacharias the other day, which is nothing new because I listen to him about every day now. Here is the cool part, I was just about to start reading Deuteronomy and this is what he was talking about. I love how things work like this so much for me now. Anyway, I would like to share what I feel God has been telling me. I am so thankful that I do not have to have all of the answers right now. Moses felt the same way, toward the end of his life this is what he said, "O Sovereign LORD, I am your servant. You have only begun to show me your greatness and power." (Deut 3:24) Even Moses felt he did not really know God, so trust me, I know that I do not have all of the right answers.

Here is what I learned from listening to Ravi and reading Deuteronomy. Vs 8:2-5, "Remember how the LORD your God led you through the wilderness for forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would really obey His commands. Yes, He humbled you by letting you go hungry and then feeding you with manna... He did it to teach you that people need more than bread for their life; real life comes by feeding on every word of the LORD... So you should realize that just as a parent disciplines a child, the LORD your God disciplines you to help you." You see I was in the wilderness and my outward appearance was that of an unsaved person. My wilderness was addictions, pornography, stripping, basically everything that the flesh could desire, I did. Anyone who would have seen me, would have said that I was about as unsaved as anyone could get. But here is the catch, God was walking with me through my wilderness.

According to Ravi, there are two main ways to learn humility. Philippians 2:3-8, "Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don't think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing. Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had... He made Himself nothing; He took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form. And in human form He obediently humbled Himself even further by dying a criminal's death on a cross." So you can either listen and obey God by living your life by Christ's example, or you can find humility by journeying through the wilderness as the Israelites did. I chose to hit my knees in the wilderness, how much easier it would have been to live by Christ's example, instead of traveling through the wilderness. But either way this journey was mine, with my LORD. He never left me in my wasteland. He was with me through all of my struggles. He is my God and He is my savior, I am His child and He will help me see Him either by example or by a long hard journey. Either way Humility is the lesson learned.

God can never make something great out of your life, until you first realize how sinful your heart truly is. Have you been resisting Christ? Have you admitted who you really are? Do you know who He is? Jesus did not come to make bad people good, He came to make dead people live!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Whining and Complaining

It is amazing to me, the different things that I get out of reading God's word. I have just finished reading Numbers, so I will try to pull some of the different things out that I have seen. I will try not to be scattered, but there is a lot of information that in just one sitting it may be hard to cover, but I will try.

Throughout the wondering in the wilderness the Israelites saw many different miracles and felt God's wrath against sin. They would praise Him for saving them and the very next day they would turn against Him. He would save them from certain death, then they would turn right around and complain against Him. 11:18-20, "The LORD has heard your whining and complaints:" (about not having any meat), "You will eat it for a whole month until you gag and are sick of it. For you have rejected the LORD, who is here among you, and you have complained against Him."

It is funny that this is the verse that I wrote. This is why: Right when I finished typing this verse my husband came in and interrupted me, for the fourth time, just since I had sat down to write this morning. The fourth time was the last straw. He asked me if his shirt was okay and that he had to have his photo taken this morning. I got up, had him take the shirt off and I proceeded to iron it. As I was ironing I was going over all of the interruptions and complaining about them, because to me none of them were that important, except this one... Then God spoke to me, from my reading this morning... Now if that didn't hit home I do not know what will. So now that I have returned to "my time" on the computer, I sit thinking how easily it is for us to whine and complain against God. In my mind I was not complaining against God, I was complaining against my husband. But this is not true, I was whining and complaining against God. The Israelites did not intentionally complain against God. They were complaining to Moses, but God took it that they were complaining against Him, because truthfully they were.

How thankful I am that it did not take me long to realize what I was doing. For I was not even half way through with the ironing and God's word was convicting me. Honestly, this could have ruined my entire day, used to it would have. For a moment this morning I was feeding my selfishness and He was listening to me complain against Him. Thankfully, He prepared me this morning for this exact occasion, so that I could listen to Him and not keep sinning. Because I was in His word, His words came to me when I needed them.

I have lived a life time in the wilderness feeding my every sinful desire, until I was gagging and sick of it. I pray I no longer have to learn from Him the hard way. This morning was easy, for I started my day with Him talking to me. He has been with me my entire life, but I had to gag on my sin before I would listen to Him. Now it is different, because I truly crave Him and want Him to direct my path. I no longer have to be so overwhelmed in my own sin, before I will listen to Him. I want to hear Him and I want to be free to obey Him. If we are willing to listen, He will talk to us when we need it the most, so that we do not ruin our day or worse, our life...

Friday, March 13, 2009

Festivals of the LORD

Okay, I know that I said, I did not like Leviticus, but really I have often looked at chapter 23. In part of my study and trying to learn as much as I can, I watch Discovering the Jewish Jesus, http://www.discoveringthejewishjesus.com/ Messianic Rabbi Schneider takes apart the 7 feast and festivals and links them to Jesus. I will do my best to give you what I have been given, by watching his program.

There are 7 feast of the Lord, each point to Jesus and are fulfilled in Him. vs 4, "In addition to the Sabbath, the LORD has established festivals, the holy occasions (convocations; rehearsal or foreshadow) to be observed at the proper time each year." vs 5-6, "First comes the LORD's Passover, which begins at twilight on its appointed day in early spring. Then the day after Passover celebration, the Festival of Unleavened Bread begins." The Lamb for Passover is Jesus. Jesus died on Passover. Everyone in the family took part in the death of the lamb. He died for each person. The lamb that died was for each member of the family. Jesus was buried on Unleavened Bread. Unleavened Bread represents sinless bread. In Jn 6:48, Jesus said, "Yes, I am the bread of life!" These are the first two feasts.

The third feast is the Festival of Firstfruits. vs 11, "On the day after the Sabbath, the priest will lift it up before the LORD so it may be accepted on your behalf." Jesus rose from the dead the day after the Sabbath, on Sunday, day of the Firstfruits. Now His entire harvest (us) is accepted by God. Jesus was lifted up to the LORD. He was the first to come back to life. Daniel 12:2, "Many of those whose bodies lie dead and buried will rise up..." The priest would take the first portion of the crop harvested and raise it to the LORD. Then the LORD would accept the rest of the harvest. Jesus was the first part of the harvest. He makes us acceptable to the LORD.

vs 16, "Keep counting until the day after the seventh Sabbath, fifty days later, and bring an offering of new grain to the LORD." Fifty days after Jesus rose from the dead, Jesus gave His Holy Spirit. We call this day Pentecost. Acts 2, "On the day of Pentecost, seven weeks after Jesus' resurrection, the believers were meeting together in one place. Suddenly, there was a sound from heaven like the roaring of a mighty windstorm in the skies above them, and it filled the house where they were meeting." The people were meeting together because this was the Festival of Harvest. This was the same day that the LORD gave the law at Mount Sinai. They were gathered together for a reason on this day, and it was on this day that the LORD gave His Holy Spirit.

We see that Jesus died on Passover; He was buried on Unleavened Bread; He rose from the dead on Firstfruits and His Holy Spirit was given on The Festival of Harvests. If things continue on the LORD's appointed Festivals then we should know that there are three Festivals that are still to come. These could very well be the days of the LORD's return. But they have not happened yet, and no one can predict the future. Only God knows. The Torah, Old Testament is full of prophetic accounts leading to Christ. He is our Savior. He is the Messiah. He is the Lamb of God. He is our Redeemer. Thank you God, for taking my punishment for me. Thank you...

Thursday, March 12, 2009

I am the LORD

I have been reading in Leviticus for the past couple of days. Oh my goodness, how monotonous and demanding this all can be. It is just a great big book of laws and regulations. Then as I got to the 20th chapter, something occurred to me, "for I am the LORD, who makes you holy; I am the LORD," kept appearing. God was making Himself known to all of the people. He wanted His people to realize that they were to obey and follow Him, and He wanted others to see that His followers were different.

Leviticus 18-22, "I, the LORD, am your God. So do not act like the people in Egypt, where you used to live, or like the people of Canaan, where I am taking you. You must not imitate their way of life... for I, the LORD, am your God. If you obey My laws and regulations, you will find life through them. I am the LORD...I am the LORD...You must be holy because I, the LORD your God, am holy... I, the LORD, am your God... for I, the LORD, am your God... I am the LORD... So set yourselves apart to be holy, for I, the LORD, am your God. Keep all my laws and obey them, for I am the LORD, who makes you holy... You must carefully obey all My laws and regulations; otherwise the land to which I am bringing you will vomit you out. Do not live by the customs of the people whom I will expel before you. It is because they do these terrible things that I detest them so much. But I have promised that you will inherit their land, a land flowing with milk and honey. I, the LORD, am your God, who has set you apart from all other people... You must be holy because I, the LORD, am holy. I have set you apart from all other people to be my very own... I am the LORD... because I, the LORD, have made him holy... I am the LORD who makes them holy... I am the LORD... I am the LORD! ... I am the LORD... I am the LORD... I am the LORD... I am the LORD, who makes them holy... I am the LORD... I am the LORD... It is I, the LORD, who makes you holy... I am the LORD."

As I read this morning, this is what kept leaping off of the page, into my heart. I am the LORD, set yourself apart, for I am your LORD. How often have I even heard the book of Leviticus mentioned and my mind dulls. It is so redundant. Law after law was given and it seemed so hard. How could anyone obey so many laws and regulations? From what you can eat, to the kind of clothes you can wear, to... it does not matter, everything had a law. But then I realized, it really was not about all these laws, but about Him. God wanted His people to realize who He was. They had been living in a land so defiled by pagan living that He had to help them. Any alcoholic will tell you that if they take one drink, they are gone. They cannot even have one sip of what they crave. God was being merciful to His people, He had to make everything so strict, because of how they lived in the past.

He is still the same LORD. He still expects us to be set apart from our society. He wants us to love, only Him. The only difference is that He desires to live in you, instead of being your commanding officer. I do not have to offer a bloody animal sacrifice, for Christ has been that beaten bloody sacrifice for me. Every whip, every scare that I should have taken for my sins, He took for me. Every day I should be going to the alter, providing a sin offering to the LORD, instead, He goes for me. All that he expects from me, is for me to set myself apart for Him. He wants others to find their LORD. He expects me to live a different life from my society.

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost For His Highest, this morning reads, "Being delivered from sin and being made holy are the result of being right with God, but surrender resulting from this kind of thinking is certainly not the true nature of Christianity. Our motive for surrender should not be for any personal gain at all. We have become so self-centered that we go to God only for something from Him, and not for God Himself... Genuine total surrender is a personal sovereign preference for Jesus Christ Himself... True surrender will always go beyond natural devotion. If we will only give up, God will surrender Himself to embrace all those around us and will meet their needs, which were created by our surrender. Beware of stopping anywhere short of total surrender to God. Most of us have only a vision of what this really means, but have never truly experienced it."

I was raised knowing who God was, but I never truly gave myself to Him. I thought that I could find happiness and fulfillment outside of His laws. What I discovered, was more pain than I should have ever tasted. Through His laws and through His love, I found true life and true joy. It was not until I completely gave myself to Him, that I found life. Have you given yourself over to the cross of Christ, so that you can feel His love? You will know if you have, by the fruit that you produce and the desires that drive you. Do you know the LORD?


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Slavery

Exodus 6:6-8, "I am the LORD, and I will free you from your slavery. I will redeem you with mighty power and great acts of judgement. I will make you My own special people, and I will be your God. And you will know that I am the LORD your God who has rescued you from your slavery... I am the LORD!"

The entire book of Exodus is dedicated to people who were slaves, and the God who was rescuing them. If you have ever been a slave to anything, then you can understand these people. As I read through this book I was able to see many different aspects of God and the people that He chose.

Our first glimpse of God is His desire for everyone to know Him. (9:16), "But I have let you live for this reason- that you might see my power and that My fame might spread throughout the earth." By the end of the plagues all believed in Him. They all believed, but in the end the choice was theirs to make; They could either make Him their God, or not, but they knew the choice they were making. He proved that He was LORD, and He let them all decide. Throughout the first 14 books, God would harden Pariah's heart so that all could see His mighty power. Once you have seen with your own eyes what God can do, it is much harder to keep denying His power. But in the end, Pharaoh changed his own mind and ran after God's people. This was God's final great act in front of all Egypt. (14:18), "When I am finished with Pharaoh and his army, all Egypt will know that I am the LORD." (14:31), "When the people of Israel saw the mighty power that the LORD had displayed against the Egyptians, they feared the LORD and put their faith in Him and His servant Moses."

God was known to all of the people. They were slaves and now they were free, but freedom is very hard to a slave. How easily we turn on those we swear to follow. Their hearts were hard and full of bitter. They now knew that they were truly free, yet they were very untrusting (15:22-27). God decided to test the people and see if they would follow Him, without complaint. Time after time they refused to place their trust in Him. Instead of turning to Him, in their time of desperation, they turned against Him. (16), "I will test them in this to see whether they will follow my instructions... He has heard your complaints, which are against the LORD and not against us... He has heard all you complaints against Him. Yes, your complaints are against the LORD, not against us." (17), "'The place of testing' - 'The place of arguing' - because the people of Israel argued with Mosses and tested the LORD by saying, 'Is the LORD going to take care of us or not?'"

Finally, after so much time and trials had passed, it seemed the LORD had finally gotten through to them. They seemed to be finally strong enough in their faith for Moses to leave them so that God could talk with him. At first they seemed to be strong and excited, but it did not take long for their old ways to come back in full force. They turned against God, (32:1). It seems that so often when we are first relieved of our slavery, God is very visible in our lives. Then it seems He will leave you alone for, really, just a short time. It seems He is testing you to see if you will really stay with Him, even if He is quiet for a time. In His unfailing love and forgiveness, He chose to forgive the people for their unfaithfulness. Finally His law was given and at the same time He gave them a job, so that they could feel needed. His law was actually an act of mercy, because when you have been a slave you need the comfort of knowing your boundaries. The tasks that He allowed them to undertake was also an act of mercy. They needed to see their good works and have a place to go in order to feel His presence.

Many times people see the book of Exodus as a hard book to understand because of all of the unfaithfulness of the people and the laws of God. But I can relate to the people and I can see God's undying mercy in His laws. I was once a slave to this world and I knew not how to accept love. After God released me from my slavery, I felt like I was wandering in a dry land that was consuming me every day. Then, for a time I worked for Him. I needed to feel His rules and His commandments, before I could accept His love. He allowed me to hear all of His statutes, in order for me to see my boundaries. I needed boundaries to follow, in order to start walking on the right path. Then, after I had learned more about Him, I was allowed to experience His love. He showed me Christ and how I was saved by Him and not by my works. He gave me a job to do, but it was out of my love for Him, that I work for Him. (40:33-34), "So at last Moses finished the work. Then the cloud covered the Tabernacle, and the glorious presence of the LORD filled it." At last I was able to feel Him and allow Him to live peacefully in me. He has made His home in my heart. I work for Him, because He loves me. I work for Him, because I love Him. He saved me, while I was still a slave to sin. He saved me, because I accepted Him as my LORD. How thankful I am that I serve such a wonderful God.

Friday, March 6, 2009

God Did It

This morning I had a very emotional time with God. I was reading Genesis, got that, I had a very emotional morning with God as I read about Joseph. That sounds so strange to me. How could anyone sit crying over Joseph? Honestly, God and His ways are very bizarre to me. I do not understand Him and I never try and say that I do. He is a wonderful mystery and I love the different feelings that I get new from Him, every day. Okay, I have read and heard the accounts of Joseph hundreds of times. But this morning was different! This is what I read. Actually, it seemed to leap off of the page at me, yelling at me. Genesis 45:5-8, Joseph said to his brothers, "But don't be angry with yourselves that you did this to me, for God did it. He sent me here... Yes, it was God who sent me here, not you!"

This is truly crazy to me. As I look at my life, the different choices that I have made; the different things that have happened to me; the different situations that I have found myself in, could all of this be God. Okay, stay with me here. I have always believed that God can and does, turn good from the evil that Satan tries to inflict upon us. I also know that He knows what I have already done and will do in the future. What if He designed all of it, so that I could be strengthened and in turn, others can find Him because of this. He makes no mistakes and He knew the path that I would take, yet He saved me right in the big mess of all of it. I am not saying that everyone should go out and strip or do drugs. I am saying that because of this "prison" that I was in, many can be fed.

Genesis 37:2, "When Joseph was seventeen years old, he often tended his father's flocks with his brothers..." 41:46, "He was thirty years old when he entered the service of Pharaoh." For thirteen years he prospered and suffered because of other people. But what he actually said was, "God did it." Joseph chose to worship God in the good times and in the pit of a prison. Because of his steadfast love of God, many were saved. A whole nation was born because of his constant dedication to God.

Obviously, God did not tell me to go out and do the things that I chose to do, but He did know that I would do them. Then He knew that others could be reached, because of them. He loved me and chose me, in spite of my failures; but not only in spite of, but maybe because of. As I have been studying Genesis, I have seen over and over the relationship that was developed between God and His people through hardships. Romans 3:27-31, "Can we boast, then, that we have done anything to be accepted by God? No, because our acquittal is not based on our good deeds. It is based on our faith. So we are made right with God through faith and not by obeying the law... He makes people right with Himself only by faith... only when we have faith do we truly fulfill the law."

Hebrews 11, is the hall of faith. "What is faith, It is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see. God gave His approval to people in days of old because of their faith." They did not always do everything perfect, but they believed God and tried with all of their hearts to please Him. Their faith is what saved them and their actions is what made them right with God. James 2:21-26, "His faith was made complete by what he did - by his actions... 'Abraham believed God, so God declared him to be righteous.' He was even called 'the friend of God.' ...we are made right with God by what we do, not by faith alone. Rahab the prostitute is another example of this. She was made right with God by her actions."

Christ came and died for me, while I was still sinning. By faith I am a child of God, but by my actions I am right with God. My greatest desires have changed. I love my Lord. I desire to please Him. I long to be called 'the friend of God.' How awesome that would be! I want my faith to mean something. I want my good deeds to mimic my faith. I want to be accounted with the rest in the 'hall of faith'. He saved me when... now I serve Him because of His undying love for me. I love Him, because He loved me first. Please God, use my life to bring you glory. I have no secrets to hide, because of You. Make my life a living testimony so others can feel Your grace. Help my life to open their eyes to your free gift.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Holy Word

Do you know why we have the written word? Do you know that it is sweeter than honey? When you read the bible do you find condemnation with everything you read, or do you find healing? Where is your heart, when you search the scriptures?

Hebrews 4:12, "For the word of God is full of living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing in all creation can hide from Him. Everything is naked and exposed before His eyes. This is the God to whom we must explain all that we have done." There was a time in my life where I shuddered at scriptures like this. I wanted to hide. I wanted to run from His sight, for I knew how I was treating Him with my life. I did not want to face my sin and change the way that I was living, so I turned from Him and despised His words. I could justify anything and everything that I was doing, as long as I did not open His words. I was only fooling myself. He created the heavens. He knit me in my mother's womb. How could I really run from Him?

Psalm 19, "The heavens tell of the glory of God. The skies display His marvelous craftsmanship. Day after day they make Him known. They speak without a sound or a word; their voice is silent in the skies; yet their message has gone out to all the earth, and their words to all the world." How can you run from God, when He is everywhere you turn? I would try running, but everywhere I turned; He was there. We can deny Him, but we are only fooling ourselves. For He is everywhere we go. His laws are written on our hearts. vs 7-11, "The law of the LORD is perfect reviving the soul. The decrees of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The commandments of the LORD are right, bringing joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are clear, giving insight to life. Reverence for the LORD is pure, lasting forever. The laws of the LORD are true; each on is fair. They are more desirable than gold even the finest gold. They are sweeter than honey, even honey dripping from the comb. They are a warning to those who hear them; there is great reward for those who obey them."

Oh, how I long to be with my LORD. I love to hear from Him. My path has changed, because He has changed my heart. 2 Timothy 3:16-17, "All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It straightens us out and teaches us to do what is right. It is God's way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God wants us to do." When I finally started reading His word, I began to live! I cannot get enough. I am finally healed and it was because He showed me the direction that I needed to take. He showed me why I was hurting. His commandments are not condemnation, but a mirror to show you why you are suffering. I no longer suffer in this life. I live for Him.

Psalm 119, "Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord. Happy are those who obey His decrees and search for Him with all their hearts. They do not compromise with evil and they walk only in His paths. You have charged us to keep Your commandments carefully. Oh, that my actions would constantly reflect Your principles! Then I will not be disgraced when I compare my life with Your commands. When I learn Your righteous laws, I will than You by living as I should! I will obey Your principles. Please don't give up on me! How can a young person stay pure? By obeying Your word and following its rules. I have tried my best to find You- don't let me wander form Your commands. I have hidden Your word in my heart, that I might not sin against You. Blessed are You, O LORD; teach me Your principles... Oh, how I love Your law! I think about it all day long... How sweet are Your words to my taste; they are sweeter than honey. Your commandments give me understanding; no wonder I hate every false way of life... I have suffered much, O LORD; restore my life again, just as You promised... Let my lips burst forth with praise, for You have taught me Your principles. Let my tongue sing about your word, for all Your commands are right."

I love you LORD. Thank you for opening my eyes to Your loving truth.


Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Righteous Faith

Our pastor, Steve, has challenged the congregation to read either the whole bible or just the New Testament. Jason and I have signed up for the whole bible. I am so glad that I have a direction to follow. I so often get lost in, "what do I read now." I love for someone to direct my path. In one respect I am a follower. In the other, if you give me some kind of guidance, I can lead. I love it. So anyway I am in Genesis. I have read through Genesis 30. I don't even know what to talk about the most, because there is truly so much to learn from these few chapters. I think I will start with Genesis 15:6, "And Abram believed the LORD, and the LORD declared him righteous because of his faith." He was declared righteous because of his faith. Do you see that even under the old, people were declared righteous because of their faith? And yet in so many ways Abram seemed to show little faith in God by his actions later in life.

God knew Abrams heart. He knew he would sin and yet he was still willing to make a covenant with him. Vs 9-18, "Abram saw a smoking fire pot and a flaming torch pass between the halves of the carcasses. So the LORD made a covenant with Abram that day..." In the customs of the past, this was a tradition in weddings. Let me explain. At weddings the fathers of the bride and groom would pass through the blood of a slain animal signifying that if their child did not keep their end of the marriage agreement, the father would pay the price with his life. By walking in the blood he was saying, "If my son/daughter does not live their role as they should, you can do this to me. I will take the punishment for their shortcomings." Notice that Abram did not pass through the blood, but God did. He kept Abram from passing through, because He knew that he would fail. The Father is the one that is responsible. God knew He was the only one who could redeem. He knew Abram and his children would not keep their part of the agreement. Christ is the one who paid. God became flesh and His blood was shed. How humbling this truly is.

After Abram's named was changed to Abraham; after he had another covenant with God; after God had personally spoken with him; after all of this, Abraham still demonstrated how truly small his faith really was. Yet he is known as a man with faith. One of the ways that he demonstrated his lack of faith is when he lied about Sarah and said she was his sister. Okay, it was partially true, but he was trying to deceived, so this made it a lie. Twice we are told of him fearing that he would be killed so that she could be taken as someone else's wife. Twice we are shown that he did not trust God fully with every aspect of his life. He was in a learning time of his relationship development with God.

Genesis 20, God talked to Abimelech in a dream. God saved Sarah and He spared Abraham's life, but it was not because of Abraham's lie that he was spared. God could have spared his life and saved him without Abraham trying to control the situation. God can talk to anyone He desires. He can do it all. What He wants from us, is to have faith and trust in Him to take care of us in every situation. Abraham was not showing good faith. I think that one of the reasons he had not yet been blessed with a son was because he still had lessons to learn. His faith was not yet ready and God wanted to show him who He really was. He had to have these situations so that he would finally learn to trust in God.

How many mistakes and lack of trust in God can we see from Abraham and Sarah's life? How many bad decisions could have they avoided, had they just trusted in God sooner? When I look at my life, the biggest mistakes that I have made were because of my lack in faith. I have believed in God my entire life, but I did not have faith. My actions demonstrated my lack of faith, but as I look at Abraham, I am given hope. God knew that he was a man of faith. He was declared righteous because of his faith, even though he was fallen, God made a covenant with him. I thank my LORD for saving me, even though I would fail Him. God knew that I would not be perfect, yet He saved me while I was still sinning. He died the death that I deserved. He knew me, and still chose me. Have you accepted your gift? Or do you still feel you should pay a dept you can never pay.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Focus on Marriage Notes

I have been substitute teaching so my post have not been as frequent, sorry...
This past Saturday was Focus on Marriage. What a wonderful event. I would like to share some of what I learned. I took some notes and this is straight from them. This is just some highlights, I am sorry if you missed it. I will do my best to let you see a glimpse of the day. This is truly a poor substitute, but the best I can do.

Gary Thomas
There was a survey taken from married couples who were on the brink of divorce. Out of the couples that were interviewed only 19% said that they were happier after they got a divorce. 80% of the couples who stayed together and worked with their marriage were happier after 5 years.
What if God didn't design marriage to make us happy, but holy: to reveal my sin: to make me ask for forgiveness... You cannot run from your stuff. Where ever you go, there you are.

If your goal in life is to serve/work for Jesus, stay single. If your goal in life is to become like Jesus, get married.

1) Rediscover the purpose for marriage-
"If romance is only very recent, isn't it possible that we are asking something of our marriages that God never intended"
Expectations produce shell shocked newly weds.
When we get married for trivial reasons we get divorced for trivial reasons.

2) Become a God centered spouse
A spouse centered spouse treats their spouse how a spouse has treated them in the last 24 hrs. You treat them how they treat you. Need to be a God centered spouse- Treat them how you are supposed to treat God.
Matt 6:33 How do I bring God's Kingdom into my house
2 Cor 7:1 put the spot light on yourself, you are not perfect
Marriage can become the best way to worship God
Love with a reverent fear of God

Key phrase for me:
God is my Father-In-Law. How am I treating His child?

Beth Moore
Ephesians 5:21 It is about order. There is order in a God centered home.
How could anything so fragile (marriage), represent anything so defined (Christ).
Baggage always attracts baggage.

1) Men tend to be more satisfied in their marriages than women. Women have an infatuation with idealism. We can be miserable with good. When did good become not good enough?
Your husbands mind is God's business, not yours. Isn't it interesting that women feel responsible for his spiritual life- it is husbands job to be concerned for the families spiritual welfare. It is his job to wash her.

Good is good, it is not perfect, it is good. We will break up homes because "this isn't enough for me." It is every day. Choose to love him again today.

2)Women want to derive our security from someone struggling with his own security and identity. We want to use our husbands as mirrors. He doesn't have to "keep up" with her spirituality. God has given him that office, get out of his office, so he can do his job.

God has given us a longing for eternity. We are not the wife of Christ, we are the bride of Christ. In heaven we are eternal brides. Here, we are a wife to our husbands.

Men are not attracted to hysterical needy women. They are attracted to their wife when she is secure in Christ. Don't try and drain him dry trying to get your womanhood from man. We get it from Jesus

Key phrase:
Submission means learning to duck so God can hit your husband.

Del Tackett
1) Devine pause in creation- "It is not good for man to be alone."
Ps 19, Job 12 Ask the animals and they will teach you
Everything is in relationship. It is all about relationship.
What happened to the Fall? Relationship with God damaged; relationship with man and wife damaged; relationship with brothers damaged; relationship with nature damaged.
It is in the very nature of God that we understand marriage.

Triune nature of God
Father-Son-Holy Spirit
Husband-Wife-Children

Perfect harmony is in God, it is the unity of God.
Holy Spirit comes from both Father and Son. Children come from both father and mother.
Submission is bound in whole nature of God. Son submits to Father. Wife submits to husband. 1Peter 3:7 ; Eph 5
God gives you a blueprint for marriage because He know you will disobey Him. There is a consequence to not obeying God.

Your husband needs your respect like you need love, it is his air.
You are not his mother, that is disrespectful to him.
He will clam up when he is disrespected. When he clams up- rewind and see if you disrespected him.

Malachi 2 Lord is witness between you and your wife.

See every thing in 3's, Devine mark of God
1= loneliest number
2= intimacy/relationship
3= community

Everything we need is bound up in the very nature of God

Key phrase:
The pernicious Lie: It is all about You!

Gary Smalley
Why don't I still have the level of patience or kindness that I should? Teach me! What am I missing?

The world's belief is: It is all about me; You only live once- go for it; things, excitement will give you life.

If your center is yourself you will destroy your relationships and you will stay in darkness. God and others is bigger than me.

When a man lusts after a woman, it is his heart, what he believes, that is in question.
Gal 5:13,14 Guard your heart above all else.

Jesus is all I need. If I think, "if you changed I would be happier." This is a lie. Jesus is all I need. His love is what makes a good marriage. You cannot manufacture God's love- His love never fails, so you are either giving it or you are not.

John 15, Jesus is the vine, I am a twig- we are all twigs- helpless without the vine.
God only gives the Kingdom of heaven to the helpless. You have to be humbled, broken, bankrupt in order to discover His greatness. 1 Jn 4:7-8, If He is just invited the sap/ Holy Spirit in the vine produces fruit in him and her. When they were twigs without the vine nothing was produced together.
Why are we yelling at our mate when they cannot do it anyway...connect to the vine and be patient to see the fruit He produces.

Value of connecting to your Father
1) Pray together - PS 1 pray that worldly beliefs will shrink
2) Bible reading - find out where we get God's grace
3)Study together - Eph 3:17
4) Attend church/small group together
5) Memorize/Meditate on scripture - Find the true meaning of the verses. Bathe in Him.
6) Listen to Christian music
7) Watch Christ centered movies like Fireproof

Increase your godly belief in marriage

Key Phrase:
Humble yourself every day and watch what God will do. All your stress is from your expectations from the world.


John Trent
During the tough times - Lift your eyes to Jesus
How to bring up there, down here.
When you are driving your car you never make drastic changes in your steering. 2 Degree changes are the important key in helping you stay between the lines. Keep it small/ simple so it actually takes effect and you don't wreck. Small changes equal big steps.

2Kings 5:3 How much easier it would have been if he had just done the simple thing first suggested. Don't hate the small steps.
Lk 19:17, Mk 9:34,37

Some steps you can take to help your marriage
1) www.strongfamilies.com
2)Bless your spouse
examples:
a) Lean over and take their hand
b)look at them lovingly with bright eyes
c)verbally tell them "what you are wearing today looks good"--One nice thing a day
d)Attach high in value-- praise them
e) Picture a special future for them
f)How you thinking differently about your relationship can change everything

Key phrase:
Your problem seems huge, until you look at each individual issue in a small way. Then it becomes do able.