Thursday, June 24, 2010

New Life/Freedom Living

Oswald Chambers, "Not being reconciled to the fact of sin— not recognizing it and refusing to deal with it— produces all the disasters in life. You may talk about the lofty virtues of human nature, but there is something in human nature that will mockingly laugh in the face of every principle you have. If you refuse to agree with the fact that there is wickedness and selfishness, something downright hateful and wrong, in human beings, when it attacks your life, instead of reconciling yourself to it, you will compromise with it and say that it is of no use to battle against it. Have you taken this “hour, and the power of darkness” into account, or do you have a view of yourself which includes no recognition of sin whatsoever?"

These past few months I have been looking often at Sodom's sins, mainly due to the fact that homosexuality had been brought to my attention often. But these past few weeks, using these same verses that I had been studying for others, He showed me my own sin. Ezekiel 16:49, "Sodom’s sins were pride, gluttony, and laziness..." Gluttony, that is the one. I never would have thought that gluttony would be my sin that God would ever show me. I am not going to say that it is a sin of excess clothes, money, or whatever most people choose to put in the place of gluttony. I am going to come out and say that I am a textbook definition of a glutton- it's food! I weigh 120 lbs and God has shown me that I, like so many others, struggle with food. Food is my sin.

I recently spent three weeks in Texas seeing doctors for my MS. I have been struggling for some time now with almost debilitating fatigue. I have known that I needed to change my diet for years, but I did not want to. I like my coffee in the morning, but I was drinking too much and now my adrenal glands are destroyed. I wanted to eat like everyone else and I wanted it all to be the easy fast way we as a society have come to enjoy. I felt like God should just heal me without any change from me, for I know He can. I almost felt like He was punishing me or not loving me if He did not take this from me by miraculous healing. Then He led my heart to another verse.

Daniel 1, "The king assigned them a daily ration of the best food and wine from his own kitchens...But Daniel was determined (But Daniel made up his mind) not to defile himself by eating the food and wine given to them by the king. He asked the chief of staff for permission not to eat these unacceptable foods."

We are as Sodom was. What are our sins as a nation? Could they be pride, laziness and gluttony? I want the quick fix. It would be much easier on my flesh if I could just take a pill, get a shot, get a miraculous healing, and all my problems go away. I want the fast food, that quick meal so that nothing is hard or messy. I want to eat my treats like I deserve them, instead of how they were meant, as a treat. Treats are Not something we eat everyday. I am a follower of Christ the most high God and He has called me to live in the world, but not as the world. He has given me my body as His temple. Why would He reward me when I am continually destroying His temple. He loves me! Now it is time for me to start treating myself with the same love He has called me to love others.

I repent of my sin. I am sorry that I abused my body in so many ways. I am sorry that I have not treated my Lord with respect by expecting Him to once again clean up my mess. I am sorry that I have fought against Him and chosen the world instead of following what I knew was best for me and others around me. I will learn to enjoy His treats the way He meant them. I am sorry I have sinned with the sin of gluttony.

It has been four weeks now since my eyes were opened to my sin. It has been four weeks of living as I should. For the first time I am now free. I feel more freedom in this life choice than I ever have. There was no freedom in being a slave of food. Now I have made up my mind as Daniel did and my healing has begun. My soul, my spirit is free! It will be work, but He has not called me to be lazy. Thank You Lord, for opening my eyes so that I could see. Thank You for showing me a new way to live and love myself. Thank You, for giving me the strength today, so that my tomorrow will be even better.

http://utmost.org/reconciling-yourself-to-the-fact-of-sin/

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