I had a conversation yesterday with one of my friends that took me back in time, back to another life.
A life time ago....
A warm summers day, the sand is warm beneath her feet. The water coming and going, one wave after another is rushing, then retreating. The air is thick with humidity. The sea gulls are above in the sky, they are below running toward the water as it leaves. A young woman dressed... hardly dressed at all, she is alone by the water. Her only companion is her beloved dog who seems to protect her from her stupidity as guys are driving by, then turning around to take another look. She seems brazen as she buys the lie of her young illusionary power. She seems indifferent. She thinks she likes this. She has forgotten. She has buried her emotions, her dreams with the constant flow of beta blockers that she keeps flowing through her veins. She is dying, but she believes she is living.
Another story, someone else's life....
A young mom, she is one of the viewed leaders of the church. She teaches and she preaches, but on Saturday night the bar is calling. The house is loud. Children are fighting. The announcers on the TV are reaching highs and lows as they anticipate the next play. There he is, just sitting there, lost in some game while her world is reeling. The keys, the car, the bar, this is her chance to have a pretend moment. A get away into another life that she dreams about, maybe this time she can turn her dreams into reality. The escape that is constantly right at her fingertips, but that is always just far enough that keeps her straining.
Two different women. Two different situations. How do you see them? Are they the same? Are they different? How do you treat them? Do you treat them the same or do you treat them differently? The one similarity, they are both lost.
Some people say that you treat everyone the same. They say, you give this person this, and that person the same thing because you must keep it fair. I say that is a lie. That is an excuse some use so that they will not be held accountable for what they are doing. Others use this excuse because in order to deal with people as individuals, you must get to know them. You have to get personal and personal is the part that is easiest to avoid. And lets face it, no on wants to be that person calling anyone out. For those of us who really know ourselves, we know we all mess up, we have all sinned.
"It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, 'You must remove the evil person from among you,'” 1 Corinthians 5:12.
But then you say, "Jesus said, If you judge other people, then you too will be judged. See the log in your eye. You have enough of your own stuff. Do not judge... period."
That too is false. Take a good look at the scripture, Matthew 7:1-5. He is not saying, not to judge, but how. Yes, we must first take a good look at ourselves. I used two very different, but similar women. The first was not someone seen as a leader, but as someone lost. The second woman put herself in a position of leadership at a church, but was also lost. "Dear brothers and sisters, not many of you should become teachers in the church, for we who teach will be judged more strictly. Indeed, we all make many mistakes." James 3:1
A warm summers day, the sand is warm beneath her feet. The water coming and going, one wave after another is rushing, then retreating. The air is thick with humidity. The sea gulls are above in the sky, they are below running toward the water as it leaves. A young woman dressed... hardly dressed at all, she is alone by the water. Her only companion is her beloved dog who seems to protect her from her stupidity as guys are driving by, then turning around to take another look. She seems brazen as she buys the lie of her young illusionary power. She seems indifferent. She thinks she likes this. She has forgotten. She has buried her emotions, her dreams with the constant flow of beta blockers that she keeps flowing through her veins. She is dying, but she believes she is living.
Another story, someone else's life....
A young mom, she is one of the viewed leaders of the church. She teaches and she preaches, but on Saturday night the bar is calling. The house is loud. Children are fighting. The announcers on the TV are reaching highs and lows as they anticipate the next play. There he is, just sitting there, lost in some game while her world is reeling. The keys, the car, the bar, this is her chance to have a pretend moment. A get away into another life that she dreams about, maybe this time she can turn her dreams into reality. The escape that is constantly right at her fingertips, but that is always just far enough that keeps her straining.
Two different women. Two different situations. How do you see them? Are they the same? Are they different? How do you treat them? Do you treat them the same or do you treat them differently? The one similarity, they are both lost.
Some people say that you treat everyone the same. They say, you give this person this, and that person the same thing because you must keep it fair. I say that is a lie. That is an excuse some use so that they will not be held accountable for what they are doing. Others use this excuse because in order to deal with people as individuals, you must get to know them. You have to get personal and personal is the part that is easiest to avoid. And lets face it, no on wants to be that person calling anyone out. For those of us who really know ourselves, we know we all mess up, we have all sinned.
"It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, 'You must remove the evil person from among you,'” 1 Corinthians 5:12.
But then you say, "Jesus said, If you judge other people, then you too will be judged. See the log in your eye. You have enough of your own stuff. Do not judge... period."
That too is false. Take a good look at the scripture, Matthew 7:1-5. He is not saying, not to judge, but how. Yes, we must first take a good look at ourselves. I used two very different, but similar women. The first was not someone seen as a leader, but as someone lost. The second woman put herself in a position of leadership at a church, but was also lost. "Dear brothers and sisters, not many of you should become teachers in the church, for we who teach will be judged more strictly. Indeed, we all make many mistakes." James 3:1
The difference was their message. What they were themselves proclaiming to live. This is so touchy. This is the hard part about being in a family, learning to love. Sometimes love is all about grace and mercy. Sometimes if you treat another person the same way, you become an enabler and are the cause of their destruction.
Someone recently made a comment on one of my blogs, "The challenge for me now is to know how to love others as they are, but not to enable them to continue on as they want to be." This is the hard part of growing. As I have traveled through this life, from the beach, to the teacher. I have had to handle situations differently, but gently. I have not gotten them all right, but I must deal with them anyway. Learning and stumbling along the way, but my heart is trying. As young men and women come into my home I must handle them with mercy and gentleness, but the same? Now that would be a shame. Each person is beautifully unique. I would not be showing them their value if they were treated equally. What value is a diamond if it is looked upon as just another piece of cut glass? Would I be showing the seasoned Christ follower, the one who knows the scriptures by heart, any sort of love if I treated them and expected the same from them as I would the drug addicted person on the street? Is that love? What is love? You know the person individually. We are to see others as Christ sees us and He knows us personally.
The problem is that we get our love and mercy confused. We judge the world. I see Christians on my college campus pointing their fingers and shouting at my kids about sin. That is no sort of love and not a part of my God. And at the same time, I see other Christians saying do not judge as one of their leaders is leading in a most despicable way toward the grave. There is balance in love. Sometimes we take the most unclothed, cover them with mercy and grace, till they are warmed with love. And other times we must step up to the hard plate and call someone out. But both are act of His love. This is why we are to get to know our Lord. Daily reading His words so that we are not confused about our roles in His world.
"The people who influence us the most are not those who detain us with their continual talk, but those who live their lives like the stars in the sky and “the lilies of the field”— simply and unaffectedly. Those are the lives that mold and shape us." Oswald Chambers
Someone recently made a comment on one of my blogs, "The challenge for me now is to know how to love others as they are, but not to enable them to continue on as they want to be." This is the hard part of growing. As I have traveled through this life, from the beach, to the teacher. I have had to handle situations differently, but gently. I have not gotten them all right, but I must deal with them anyway. Learning and stumbling along the way, but my heart is trying. As young men and women come into my home I must handle them with mercy and gentleness, but the same? Now that would be a shame. Each person is beautifully unique. I would not be showing them their value if they were treated equally. What value is a diamond if it is looked upon as just another piece of cut glass? Would I be showing the seasoned Christ follower, the one who knows the scriptures by heart, any sort of love if I treated them and expected the same from them as I would the drug addicted person on the street? Is that love? What is love? You know the person individually. We are to see others as Christ sees us and He knows us personally.
The problem is that we get our love and mercy confused. We judge the world. I see Christians on my college campus pointing their fingers and shouting at my kids about sin. That is no sort of love and not a part of my God. And at the same time, I see other Christians saying do not judge as one of their leaders is leading in a most despicable way toward the grave. There is balance in love. Sometimes we take the most unclothed, cover them with mercy and grace, till they are warmed with love. And other times we must step up to the hard plate and call someone out. But both are act of His love. This is why we are to get to know our Lord. Daily reading His words so that we are not confused about our roles in His world.
"The people who influence us the most are not those who detain us with their continual talk, but those who live their lives like the stars in the sky and “the lilies of the field”— simply and unaffectedly. Those are the lives that mold and shape us." Oswald Chambers
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