Spirit of Truth

I've noticed something about church and baptism.  The longer I have been involved with this whole church setting and watched people get baptized the more I have noticed a definite struggle afterwards.  It seems to always come. People will be doing so good with God.  They will be on fire. Reading what they should read, watching what they should watch, having a true life changing life, then they get baptized and "fall away".  I've always thought it was because they were attacked by Satan more afterwards.  I'm not so sure I was right.  

Welcome to a recent revelation/understanding, a thought process that I am still processing.  This past Sunday, I was reading in Acts and came across something that held me pause for a moment.  "8:15-16...They were especially eager to see if the new believers would receive the Holy Spirit because until this point they had been baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus but had not experienced the Holy Spirit." (Pause)
What is it about the Holy Spirit?  When people get baptized, do they have to keep searching?  Was their confession of God not enough?  What more do we have to do?  I thought that God did everything?  Do we have to know the mysteries of the Holy Spirit, speak in tongues, cast out demons, heal the sick?  What more do I need to do? Are these acts separate acts?  Can they be linked?  What is it that I need to understand better?

Then I moved on.  A short pause very early in the morning that got my heart and mind ready for my answer later that day.  I didn't know that my questions on baptism and the Holy Spirit would come, but they did.  At church Pastor Steve was in Acts, no coincidence since that is what we are studying together as a whole.   While he was teaching he took us to several other places in John... 14:16-17, "I will ask the Father to send you another Helper, the Spirit of truth, who will remain constantly with you. The world does not recognize the Spirit of truth, because it does not know the Spirit and is unable to receive Him. But you do know the Spirit because He lives with you, and He will dwell in you." 15:26-27, "I will send a great Helper to you from the Father, one known as the Spirit of truth. He comes from the Father and will point to the truth as it concerns Me. But you will also point others to the truth about My identity, because you have journeyed with Me since this all began." 16:12-14, "I have so much more to say, but you cannot absorb it right now. The Spirit of truth will come and guide you in all truth. He will not speak His own words to you; He will speak what He hears, revealing to you the things to come and bringing glory to Me. The Spirit has unlimited access to Me, to all that I possess and know, just as everything the Father has is Mine. That is the reason I am confident He will care for My own and reveal the path to you."

Why does it appear that newly baptized individuals struggle?  Why do they have such a hard time?  Is it because Satan is attacking them? I used to think so, but this answer is different than any I had ever received.  I don't think it is only because Satan turns up the heat.  I think it could also be because the Holy Spirit is revealing truth to us and there is nothing harder than looking at the truth within our own hearts. How do we handle that truth?  I think we often believe it.  This is when it appears we have "fallen away."  We know this truth about our own hearts and instead of accepting that truth and allowing God to do a mighty work with us, we give up and accept our ugly truth in the name of failure, and step away from the body of Christ.  "Work out your own salvation"... Work....Work is the key.  It does not come easily.  Yes, being saved is easy, but the rest is hard work and this is where most of us give up and think we cannot continue.  

I have been baptized (fully immersed with water) twice in my life.  The first time was when I was 12.  I really did not understand or have the right heart. I was doing it because I was told that if I didn't, I would go to hell.  Not true... Not ok... Anyways, the next time I was 33.  I had already been going through the whole Truth thing.  I had spent years looking at who I had been, discovering God and His true love for me, looking at the truth within my own heart, looking at who I was without Him, looking at Him... on and on it went, but all of it looking at Truth and accepting Him.  Truth, "He comes from the Father and will point to the truth as it concerns Me. But you will also point others to the truth about My identity, because you have journeyed with Me since this all began."  Before we are ready to start on the journey of pointing others to the Truth about God, we must first be willing to accept the truth He is revealing to us, about us.  My truth did not come just when I was baptized, but it came in between my baptisms.  It was not some miraculous slaying of the Holy Spirit, but The Spirit of Truth that I had to accept so that I could be of more use to God and His Kingdom.  

After we have accepted The Spirit of Truth there should be evidence of that acceptance.  I believe the first part of that evidence lays within this Spontaneous Love for others.  It is having Mercy for them, the way God has had for you.  It is in accepting them, not as they are, but as they could be with God.  It is in the ability to set your own thoughts and desires aside and allow His Love to be felt through you, passed on to them.  But it all starts with The Spirit of Truth.  Are you willing to accept the truth God is showing you today about your own heart?  Are we ready to move on to the rest God has for us and through us?

Side note.... I am in no way a Theologian on the Holy Spirit!  This is just a fraction of the mysteries of the Holy Spirit as was revealed to me.  Always, the question we should be asking ourselves....
Are we willing to look at Truth within ourselves, with God.  Can we look closely enough so that He can do a mighty work within us?  

"I Do"

What do you think of when you hear the phrase, "I do"?  This past weekend was Easter Sunday, while we were at church I kept hearing "I do".  I was one of the ones that said "I do" as part of a beautiful baby dedication/baptism.  It was a phrase that was heard throughout the sanctuary as others, including the baby's momma (the baby that I held nestled in my arms), were baptized (fully immersed in water, a choice made as a commitment to God).  "I do", a commitment phrase that was heard around the world on Easter as people were pronouncing their belief that Jesus Christ is Lord.  "I do" a commitment phrase heard around the world every day as others are getting married and committing themselves to stay with their mate they have chosen: For better or worse, Richer or poorer, Through sickness and health.  A promise, a commitment, to serve and to love.  What have we committed our-self to? What are we dedicated to as we live our day to day life?

Sadly, I have been married two times to two very different men in two very different ways.  I have written in more detail on my first marriage in "Sin's False Love", so I will spare you and me both from that road trip for now.  In that marriage I committed myself to a man and he became my lord, and because of that commitment to a man, we both fell apart.  This time I am married again, but the commitment is different.  My commitment is to Christ first, then to my marriage.  When Jason and I were married we had within our vows that we were confident that God had chosen the other for us.  We were confident and made our declaration to God to be focused on Him first, then our marriage within this new family, second.  Two very different commitments. Two very different lives. One filled with Christ as the center, the other with relational infidelity ruling us. Commitments just the same, one that was self serving adultery and the other a servant that is full of abundant life.

Easter weekend, a very big weekend indeed!  Christ went to the cross as an atoning sacrifice, a sin offering.  He lived gallantly and died with sin on display before the world.  Colossians 2:15, "He disarmed those who once ruled over us—those who had overpowered us. Like captives of war, He put them on display to the world to show His victory over them by means of the cross." Then after He rose He gave all of us a charge.  Mark 16:15, "Go out into the world and share the good news with all of creation. Anyone who believes this good news and is ceremonially washed (in water baptism) will be rescued, but anyone who does not believe it will be condemned."  At the end of all of the gospels is a charge to all of us to go out and tell our live's story, so that His story is revealed to the world, our world that we are each a part of. In Jonh 21, Jesus appears to His disciples and asks Peter three different times, "Do you love me?" All three very hurt-felt moments on Peters confession of his love for his Lord, he says, "Yes Lord, You know I love You."  Then Jesus' charge, "Feed My sheep, look after My people, share My story." We are each called to go alone on this journey. It is our personal journey that we must do alone, Oswald Chambers. 

I thought I would sleep in this morning.  I thought that since I went to bed around 12:30am, that I would be able to sleep till at least 7am.  I am not bragging.  I am not saying that everyone must get up at 5:30am, but I am saying that my alone time with my God was calling.  I hear His voice better in the morning, before my boys awake, before life distractions take my focus, but even with this I must be careful.  Do you Worship the Work?  Must I have "my time with God"?  Often, I have discovered that my alone time "with God", can become a work, if it is interrupted, I do not live as someone in love with Christ.  "I worship my time with my coffee" is more like it. Every moment of every day, I must call myself to refocus.  I must commit myself to be committed to Him and what He is showing me in that moment, where I should walk, who I should show His love to.  It is when my heart is being selfish that I discover I am living in "sin" no matter how good it may appear on the surface.  I am saying this because this past Easter Sunday, my alone time with my coffee was interrupted.  I call it my coffee time, because my focus was not on my God at all, but on a time of day to be quiet with my coffee. If that interruption destroys my story about my "changed" life with Christ, my focus is taken off of Him and how I am to show His love to others, die to myself, and rise new with Him.  It is distorted and relational infidelity is the result. The Habit of having No Habits

Are we able to live in focus with our God?  Have we made that commitment with our own lives and are we following through with that commitment?  He has proven His love for us.  He felt it well worth it to live as one of us.  He did not come to be one of us in the glory and "easy" life, but He chose to be born in poverty, to be baptized to show part of His obedience, to die a disgraceful death upon a cross.  But all of it, His whole life and ours, is about the Resurrection to a New Life, and that is well worth living for.  It is about disarming that power that once ruled over us and living free with Christ as our ruler.  Who/what is your ruler?  Where is our commitment today?

Son of Man, a Second Touch

Mark 8:22-37, as we begin this journey through a second look into a very similar story please read the links, so we can follow my random thoughts easier! The healings that the Christ preforms are usually instant and full. This time a second touch is needed. "Can you see anything?" Jesus asks. "Yes, I see people but they look like trees." Again Jesus touches him and asks if he can see. This time the healing was complete. Mark gives us this story as a possibility that we may need to look again. Look this time and see what we can find new and complete...

Who is Jesus the Christ? What are our expectations of Him? What do we expect to happen with our own lives by being called His followers?

Jesus asked them, "Who do you say that I am?" Peter's reply, "You are God's anointed the Liberating King.... the Messiah."

With this answer came expectations. They expected the Messiah to be a political leader, a conqueror, to set them free from their Roman oppressors. In His own explanation of Himself Jesus said much differently.

I, the "Son of Man must suffer many terrible things and be rejected by the elders, the leading priests, and the teachers of religious law. He would be killed, but three days later he would rise from the dead."

We suffer. We have trials. We have sadness and loss. Jesus came as the "Son of Man". He came to suffer with us, for us, and to conquer death that is ever trying to trap us. As the Son of Man He has demonstrated the way and we are to follow Him there.

“If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake and for the sake of the Good News, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"

Mark 14, Go to Link!

Why did all of this happen? Did the woman really understand what she was doing? Did she know that she was preparing Jesus for burial? I think she was showing Him appreciative love. She was grateful for how He had helped her. It doesn't say how He had touched her, but we know that she loved and appreciated Him.

A look at Judas... We know that Judas was part of the 12, but we know that he still had deceit in his heart. He stole from the money that he was in charge of. He didn't embrace Jesus and His teachings on love. He saw Jesus the way that most saw Him, a conqueror. I don't think that Judas really knew what He was doing. I think he believed Jesus to be the Messiah, but his understanding of what that meant was off. I think that he was trying to force his belief. He was forcing Jesus to take a stand and battle. He wanted Him to reign and defeat his enemy. When this did not turn out how he thought it should have, he felt great remorse and begged for the money to be taken back. He wished he had never been born and killed himself for what he had done. He wasn't willing to follow Jesus all the way until the end to see how things would turn out. He turned his back on life and ended it in suicide.

A look a Peter.... Peter was ready to die in battle. He was prepared to go into battle with Jesus like Strider was prepared to battle for Froto in Lord of the Rings. But Jesus wanted them to understand differently. He was battling with them by being one of them! He was the true Son of Man and He was going all the way in suffering, to death. I don't think Peter really denied Jesus, but he was confused on what he was supposed to do. He was ready to draw his sword, but he was told not to. He heard that death was coming, but didn't understand the way. His denial was said in confusion.... not in true denial, when he realized what he had actually done, he left sorrowfully. He couldn't believe the reality of his words. They were true and he had actually (in misunderstanding) denied his Lord.

What are my expectations with my Christ? I have begged and pleaded for healing for over 19 years. I now see a way through intelligent design, through stem cells that have been laying dormant for all this time, just waiting to be awoken. I am counting on this healing, a fresh start in life. But what if my healing doesn't come? What if it doesn't work the way I see? Am I going to give up on life? Am I going to commit emotional suicide? Am I going to deny my Lord, because of my confusion?

I have been on this journey too long to give up now. This is not about what I want or what I can get out of this Jesus thing. It is about my true belief in my God. Can I go with Him, even if it is through suffering unto death? Can You Come Down from the Mountain? Can I stand with Him no matter where He is taking me, no matter what my understanding may be?

Communion with God

"He was despised and rejected—
a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
We turned our backs on him and looked the other way.
He was despised, and we did not care." Isaiah 53:3

Last night we covered chapter 24 of The Story.  There are so many parables and teachings from Christ within this one chapter.  I will attempt to pull out just a few.  First there is the story of the sower and his seeds.  Which I have previously blogged about in Fertile Soil. So I will move on to the Lost Coin and Prodigal Son, these are my hearts tug this morning as my heart aches for the missing one.
"Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear."
Luke 15, “Suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Won’t she light a lamp and sweep the entire house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she will call in her friends and neighbors and say, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, there is joy in the presence of God’s angels when even one sinner repents.”

Rejoice with me for I have found what I had lost.  Share with me, have relationship with me.  Laugh with me for what I thought was gone has been found.  Lets celebrate together as family and friends... that calling, relationship.

"To illustrate the point further, Jesus told them this story: “A man had two sons. The younger son told his father, ‘I want my share of your estate now before you die.’ So his father agreed to divide his wealth between his sons.

A few days later this younger son packed all his belongings and moved to a distant land, and there he wasted all his money in wild living. About the time his money ran out, a great famine swept over the land, and he began to starve. He persuaded a local farmer to hire him, and the man sent him into his fields to feed the pigs. The young man became so hungry that even the pods he was feeding the pigs looked good to him. But no one gave him anything.

When he finally came to his senses, he said to himself, ‘At home even the hired servants have food enough to spare, and here I am dying of hunger!  I will go home to my father and say, 'Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant.’

So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him. His son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son.’

But his father said to the servants, ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.’ So the party began."

So many focus on the son and what he had done.  The son told his father that he no longer counted him as alive and that he was going to live with his inheritance as if his father were already dead.  While this is a very strong message, the father is even more distinct in the Eastern cultures.  If a son ever does this to his father and shows him such lack of respect, the father counts him as dead and will never talk to him again, but this is not what has happened.  Instead, the father runs and embraces his son while he is still a long way from home, brings him back within his protective embrace.  He doesn't ask for an explanation.  He doesn't need to hear what has happened. He is content with his son being there and willing to love again.

God has been portrayed in so many ways.  He is vengeful, jealous, condemning, the list to the outsider can go on and on.  I have been the child that leaves, I have been the betrayer, but I have never experienced any of these things from my God.  I know a God that only wants that relationship with us.  He is begging us to have Communion with Him.  That relationship that nothing else will ever fill.  For without Him we are ever seeking, but never finding.

Communion with God, it is never about who I am or what I have done wrong, but about Him.  That bread and wine, His body and blood.  We taste, smell, touch, feel His presence.  It is a moment of worship that fills our ever reaching hearts desire.  Empty Stomachs that need the filling of His presence. "Whoever has ears to hear, let him hear." It is in the hearing that we are able to finally see.  The depths of this simple act are more profound than we will ever truly know.  The more I get to know my Christ, the more in awe I am of Him.  He is richer, has more depth, is soft in the core and has every flavor the senses can reach.  He is about relationship.  The more I discover of Him, the more intoxicated I become.  I want to smell His smell. Touch and taste His goodness.  I want to sit at His feet and allow Him to be the only voice I can hear.  This relationship is long suffering, but He is ever present.  

He must feel like He is watching the grass grow as I work out my own insecurities.  For relationships scare me.  What if I give Him my heart and in the end, find I have been the fool?  What if.... But my what if's, have only left me more alone and miserable than I ever want to experience again.  I need this relationship.  I need to have Communion with my Lord. 

Every true relationship takes time, in small pieces we take a bite.  If we sat at a huge banquet table and discovered that we had to ingest every ounce of the food that was present, at first it may seem wonderful, but we would soon discover that those delicacies overwhelmed us.  It is in the small bites and swallows that we can better digest our Lord. For He is much too big for any of us to receive all at once. 

Are we willing to give Him a second chance?  He is ever waiting and watching for us.  He is ever patient with us and our timing. Even if by what others perceive, "it is like watching the grass grow", for many times it is not what we can see, but what is actually happening beneath the surface.  Truly wonderful relationships take time and patience.  They are the ones that have our hearts. This is Communion with God... Feel, Taste, Touch, Smell, Hear, and See His Goodness.

The Glory that is Unsurpassed

It is all perspective.  For God, it doesn't seem long to sit, watch, and wait for the the grass to grow.