Your Reward

Ecclesiastes 7:26, "I discovered that a seductive woman is more bitter than death. Her passion is a trap, and her soft hands will bind you. Those who please God will escape from her, but sinners will be caught in her snare."

This really has more meaning behind it than it appears. The lure of the seductive woman is that she is promising life and fulfilment, but really all she offers is death. Men who fall under her spell will reap a sorrow that they never expected. They expect to find honor, respect, and sexual pleasure that no other can match. But instead, in the end, they find disgrace, contempt and impotence. What used to satisfy them, now does not even begin to entertain them. The sex they thought they were getting has become a drug and they are left with the delusion, "if they can just get a little more, this time she will fill them." Oh, how bitter and sad her touch has become.

I have addressed the male side of the pornography world, but now it is time to see the woman's side. I was the seductive woman. I was the one promising so much to men. I was using them, while they used me. In the end, it left me with a bitterness and disgust towards men that many cannot imagine. When I married Jason, I was so broken; I was so hard. I hated men. I used them, and I desired them, but I hated them. I thought they were all weak, manipulative, pathetic liars. Many men have hurt their wives, and now they think she is a very unforgiving and bitter woman. She only has one or two men, she feels have wronged her. Can you imagine the scorn of a woman who has been harmed by hundreds of men? Jason really never did anything to me, but he was a man. So this put him in the wrong group from the beginning.

At the start of our marriage, things did not look very promising. Jason was young and I was a wreck. How do you mend something that you never broke to begin with? The healing started one day at a time. He truly looked at how Christ treated His church, Eph 5. Jason looked at me and what I needed, not what he desired. He began serving me; little things, like fixing my breakfast on Saturday mornings. He would help me pick up the house. He would wash the dishes. He did not watch TV, until after I went to bed. He would talk to me about his day and ask me about mine. We began working as a team around the house, and I began to soften. It took several years; a wound never heals over night. But one day at a time, we began to build a relationship.

Ecclesiastes 9:9, "Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you in this world. The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil."

Jason no longer has to work so hard. He still helps me, but his labor is not in vain. He worked for my love and affection, he worked at mending my broken heart, now he can enjoy his reward. We have a wonderful marriage. Our relationship is not perfect, we work on it every day. Some days, I have to work a little harder and other days, Jason works a little more. But in the end we both are working for God and trying to glorify Him through our marriage. We work as a team, and we play as a team.

I am so thankful that Jason worked so hard for me. With his help, I have found that men are not weak. They are not pathetic. Given the right teacher, Christ, they can tear down the greatest of walls.