Close my Mouth

Micah 6, "...Tell Me why your patience is exhausted! Answer Me! For I brought you out of Egypt and redeemed you from your slavery... the LORD has already told you what is good... to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God." Matthew 15:18-20, "Those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart... For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies. These are the things which defile a man..."

Oh, how I hate how I act. I hate the sin in my life. I hate the failure that I can be. My worst enemy has always been me. I am not a patient mother or wife. God has given me a family that most would dream about. My husband is patient and loving with me. He helps me around the house. He shows me his love by serving me, as Christ served those He loved. My boys are sweet and fun. They are full of life and curious about everything beautiful. I truly have no complaints, then why are there so many negative things that come out of my mouth. I am my own worst enemy. My heart is full of selfishness and my mouth is full of death. How do I change my heart, for out of the heart the mouth speaks.

I have felt this way before about my mouth and Christ subdued it, till my heart followed. I must release control of my mouth, so that He can change my heart. There was a time when I hated all men with a passion that most cannot understand. In order for Him to change my heart, I had to close my mouth. I must do this again. It is going to take work and effort on my part. Change is never easy. We get used to living a certain way and we feel pain when the labor increases. I hate pain, but I despise the hate in my heart even more. If I will do the work and control my mouth, He will change my heart. That change that He wants me to make, is so worth the reward at the end.

Micah 7, "...The LORD will bring me out of my darkness into the light, and I will see His righteousness... Once again You will have compassion on us. You will trample our sins under Your feet and throw them into the depths of the ocean!" I have been on this journey before. It was a different sin, a different addiction, but the same heart. He is still working on me, until that day when my entire heart is under His control. I am not perfect, I never will be. But as long as I am willing to look directly at my sin and ask Him for help in healing my broken heart, my journey toward purity will only get better. I am a work in progress and it is about the journey now, that counts.

Oswald Chambers, "We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself."

Oh God, please help me to remember that it is about today. It is about each step that I take and every moment that counts. Give me Your love so that I can show my children how much You love them. Give me Your strength, so that I can show my husband how much you adore him. Help me to close my mouth, so that You can heal my broken heart.

http://www.rbc.org/devotionals/my-utmost-for-his-highest/07/28/devotion.aspx?year=2009