I Worship You Only

Every morning, the first thing I crave, is to sit at my Lords feet and worship Him. I love to listen to His words and learn His ways. I am a woman from sorrow, redeemed by the love of one Man. I have willingly eaten the fruit of bitterness and regret, but now I am living in the comfort of my Lord. My journey started, because I would not listen to those who had gone before me. Mark 16:14, "He rebuked them for their unbelief- their stubborn refusal to believe those who had seen Him after He had risen." I can say, "But, I had no one to help me. No one told me." However this is not true for any of us. He has given us everything that we need in this life, but most of the time we are too deaf to hear and too blind to see. My heart was set on finding a man. Not even the right man, just a man. In this blind pursuit of my earthly desires, I chose a man who was not seeking after God's heart. Since I was not following Christ's desires for me in the first place, I followed my husband. For every woman really wants her husband to lead her.

Mark 15:40-41, "Some women were watching from a distance. Among them were Mary Magdalene, Mary (the mother of James the younger and of Joseph), and Salome. In Galilee these women had followed Him and cared for His needs. Many other women who had come up with Him to Jerusalem were also there." My desire used to be only for my husband to lead me, but then I realized my true desire is for my Savior. My true desire is to sit at my Lords feet and anoint Him with my worship. My true longing is to spend every moment of every day, with Him leading my every step. I want to follow Him. I want to praise Him. I want to have the feeling of loving Him sweep through my body and control my every action. My desire is for my true Lover, my King.

I thank my God for allowing me to have a second chance at life. I thank Him for allowing me start new, with a new husband, a fresh start. My desire is to follow my husband, that is how I am made. I will follow him anywhere as long as he is following Christ. Ephesians 5, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord...Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word.." If we are both searching for Christ and desiring to please Him, we will have a good marriage. Even if my husband decided to leave the will of Christ, I now know he is not my only command. My desire to follow my husband, goes along side my desire to follow my Lord. I submit to my Lord first. I am in love with my God and because my husband is following the will of Christ, I will gladly go anywhere with him. If he chooses and leaves the will of God, I will not follow him. I will not leave him, nor will I nag him, but I will not follow him away from my true love. I have finally found what true worship and glory really is and I will never let it go again. I am finally a truly fulfilled woman.

"Thank You God, for washing me in Your love. Thank You for giving me a desire for You that fulfills every longing that I have. Thank You for giving me a husband whose desire is also for You. Thank You for allowing me to express my worship and love for You through my relationship with Jason. Help me to remember that he is not perfect like You, for no one is. Help me to show those who come into my pressence, Your love and Your acceptance. Thank you..."