Mother's Day, "It's Not About Me"

The theme of my life seems to be, "It's not about me." While I was on vacation Mother's Day came, so I went for a short walk. I wanted some alone time, some time to reflect and clear the air. You know, no matter how wonderful your relatives are, sometimes, some alone time is a must so you can think. Mother's Day, I took some time to myself and went for that walk I so desperately needed. It was a cold breezy day. It had rained the day before and the air was crisp, my in-laws home is just a few short blocks from the coast in Portland Maine, so I could feel the sea in the air. It was on this walk that I was reflecting on the day ahead and how I had spent Mother's Day in the past. It was during this time that my eyes were opened. It was during this time that the true joy of the day was not about me at all. It was during this time that I saw my boys for the first time, like I had never seen them before.

I am a mother, so I am speaking from how I need to look out at each day, including those holidays that tend to let me say, "It's all about me." This is my struggle, I tend to want to become selfish. If I get an excuse and others tell me it is okay to become selfish, then I become a monster. I want to say, "Do you see all that I do? Do you care that I do so much for you? Are you going to dote on me now, for you know that I deserve this!" This realization toward self-centeredness helped me to look at Mother's Day and being a mother in a whole new light. What a blessing to be a mother. If I hadn't had my boys, I would not be a mommy. This holiday and really everyday is about my children. Not even one day can be set aside for me, and that is okay, for this was the best Mother's Day I had ever had. This realization helped me to see my boys like I had never seen them before. The day did not go according to my plans and my time, but it was the best Mother's Day I had ever had and I didn't even get flowers!

Psalm 34, "I will praise the Lord at all times. I will constantly speak His praises. I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart. Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt His name together. I prayed to the Lord, and He answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to Him for help will be radiant with joy; ...Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in Him!... Come, my children, and listen to me, and I will teach you to fear the Lord..."

After my walk was over and I had sung praises to my Lord, because He had opened my eyes, when I entered the house my attitude about the day had changed. I called each boy to come and speak with me alone. I took each son in my arm and asked him if he knew what this day was about. Each of them said that it was about me, but I looked at them lovingly in my arms and corrected them. I took that sweet baby in my arms and said, "No, it is about you! Did you know that if you were not here, this day would not be special for me. If you were not here, I would have nothing to celebrate. This day is special for me, all because of you. Today, I am celebrating you. Thank you so much for making this day so wonderful for me." Those precious babies each had this wonderful look on their faces when I told each of them how special they were. All because I looked at the reason I could celebrate Mother's Day, this was the best Mother's Day I had ever had. The only reason it was so wonderful for me is because it was not about me.

I will make mistakes as a mother. I will let the selfish root sneak in and try to turn me into a monster, but my eyes have been opened and I have no excuse to stay that way. If I can keep the focus on the true reason for my joy, then I will be blessed. All I have to do is to remember the greatest command: “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.’ And, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” If I will keep my focus on God, on others, then I will always have reasons to rejoice. If I will do this, then I will not become the monster of selfishness. Proverbs 31, "Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her:'There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!' Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise." She will be praised, because it was never about her...