I am fired up this morning. It is crazy, but I am. Yesterday, I could not get past 2 Corinthians 6. One chapter is as far as I was able to read. This morning, I read 7-13, the rest of 2 Corinthians. It is funny to me how people think that Christians should only teach others by telling them about their weakness. I know, for I am guilty of this. I would much rather tell people how much I do not know and the bad that I have done. For otherwise, I fear they will think that I am boasting. What I expect when I go to "church" is to hear a lesson on how to live peacefully for God and to leave there feeling all happy and full. I go as a glutton, expecting to be filled. This is not at all what, basically, the entire book of 2 Corinthians is about. It is about Paul giving his defense and letting them know just how much he has done for them.
2 Cor 10, "We are human, but we don’t wage war as humans do. We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ. And after you have become fully obedient, we will punish everyone who remains disobedient.
Look at the obvious facts. Those who say they belong to Christ must recognize that we belong to Christ as much as they do. I may seem to be boasting too much about the authority given to us by the Lord. But our authority builds you up; it doesn’t tear you down. So I will not be ashamed of using my authority..."
Yesterday, Aaron gave a wonderful lesson about the war that we have. 2 Timothy 2, "Soldiers don’t get tied up in the affairs of civilian life, for then they cannot please the officer who enlisted them. And athletes cannot win the prize unless they follow the rules. And hardworking farmers should be the first to enjoy the fruit of their labor. Think about what I am saying. The Lord will help you understand all these things." He gave a beautiful apologetic (defense) for the battle we are in as Christians. "When you are on the battle field your perspective is different than when you are USO (on vacation). Your expectation is different. When in war you endure. Your complaints are different. Are you inconvenienced or are you incapacitated? Health care is different, your appetite is different- junk food vs real food. Relationships are different- superficial vs significant. Your heart is different."
While he was speaking, he was boasting. Not of himself, but the power given him by the authority a worker of Christ has. In this defense, I was strengthened! Then this morning I read what Paul says and he does the exact same thing. "We will boast only about what has happened within the boundaries of the work God has given us, which includes our working with you...And since others boast about their human achievements, I will, too. After all, you think you are so wise, but you enjoy putting up with fools! ...But whatever they dare to boast about—I’m talking like a fool again—I dare to boast about it, too." All over Paul is giving his defense. He did not keep it a secret and quietly go to one individual, but he publicly gave his apologetic. We too are to give our defense. We are in a battle and sometimes that means gaining strength in God by looking at the battles we have won. It means taking up arms and standing our ground, so that we are not overcome by Satan ourselves.
Things come to me in threes. Yesterday, I read chapter 6. Then I went to church and heard a lesson that backed up what I was reading. Now today, I finished with the rest and was strengthened even more. Sometimes we need to remember the authority that we have and we need to boast about that authority so that we can win the battle. If you ever go to church and feel you are getting blasted, because what is being said seems like boasting, maybe you should read these verses and see that sometimes we need to be reminded that we are in a war. Do you know that you are in a battle? Do you see it, but instead focus on the small things? Do we wake every morning with great expectation to see where we will be taken today? If you were there yesterday, did you leave strengthened, or were you more offended that the service did not feed your appetite like you thought it should? Where are you in this battle? Did you sign up as a ready soldier, or do you live as a reluctant draft?
Monday, April 11, 2011
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Veil Taken Away
2 Corinthians 3:12ff, "Since this new way gives us such confidence, we can be very bold. We are not like Moses, who put a veil over his face so the people of Israel would not see the glory, even though it was destined to fade away. But the people’s minds were hardened, and to this day whenever the old covenant is being read, the same veil covers their minds so they cannot understand the truth. And this veil can be removed only by believing in Christ. Yes, even today when they read Moses’ writings, their hearts are covered with that veil, and they do not understand. But whenever someone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like Him as we are changed into His glorious image."
I was once talking to a sweet young woman about my life and she just could not understand. To her, everything that I had done, since I truly gave my life to Christ, seemed like I was walking blind. She thought that the decisions I had made, were decisions made in blindness, and it is by shear luck that they worked out the way they did. But to me, the way that I lived before was living in blindness. I was a wanderer, wandering around in the darkness of the world.
As I watch others living out their lives, I am often heartbroken because of the choices that I see them making. They think that I do not understand and I am just judging them, because I do not see things their way. But I am not. I now see things more clearly than I ever have before. I have opened my heart up toward God enough, so that I see things more clearly now through His eyes. I can clearly see sin, but I can also more clearly see how much He loves us and how He is crying out for us to see things through His eyes. Now please do not take this and think, that I think, I know it all and that I think that I am perfect. I also see my own heart more and know how truly evil I am. It is not in seeing how much we have sinned. It is not about our sin at all. It is, everything is, about His Holiness.
If we are going out and partying; If we are getting high; If we are sleeping around; If we are living for our next physical pleasure; If we are living for our next false intimacy, it is about our sin. For all that we can think about is our next time to live out that high. Everything becomes about us. What is that next big rush we are living for? Or, what is it that we are going to spend our time crying over, because we cannot get our mind off of whatever it was that we just did? All in all, it remains about us.
But we are called not to live for that next pleasure. We are called to live in His joy. 2 Cor 5:14, "Christ’s love controls us. Since we believe that Christ died for all, we also believe that we have all died to our old life. He died for everyone so that those who receive his new life will no longer live for themselves. Instead, they will live for Christ, who died and was raised for them...This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"
Oswald Chambers, "Being saved and seeing Jesus are not the same thing. Many people who have never seen Jesus have received and share in God’s grace. But once you have seen Him, you can never be the same. Other things will not have the appeal they did before.
You should always recognize the difference between what you see Jesus to be and what He has done for you. If you see only what He has done for you, your God is not big enough. But if you have had a vision, seeing Jesus as He really is, experiences can come and go, yet you will endure “as seeing Him who is invisible” (Hebrews 11:27). The man who was blind from birth did not know who Jesus was until Christ appeared and revealed Himself to him (see John 9). Jesus appears to those for whom He has done something, but we cannot order or predict when He will come. He may appear suddenly, at any turn. Then you can exclaim, “Now I see Him!” (see John 9:25)."
Where is your true heart's focus? What is your true desire? We must look at ourselves with truth, in order to see Him more clearly. If you have truly given your life to Christ, there will be proof of that in the way you live, in your focus for your life. What is your focus? Do you see Him, or do you see your sin?
I was once talking to a sweet young woman about my life and she just could not understand. To her, everything that I had done, since I truly gave my life to Christ, seemed like I was walking blind. She thought that the decisions I had made, were decisions made in blindness, and it is by shear luck that they worked out the way they did. But to me, the way that I lived before was living in blindness. I was a wanderer, wandering around in the darkness of the world.
As I watch others living out their lives, I am often heartbroken because of the choices that I see them making. They think that I do not understand and I am just judging them, because I do not see things their way. But I am not. I now see things more clearly than I ever have before. I have opened my heart up toward God enough, so that I see things more clearly now through His eyes. I can clearly see sin, but I can also more clearly see how much He loves us and how He is crying out for us to see things through His eyes. Now please do not take this and think, that I think, I know it all and that I think that I am perfect. I also see my own heart more and know how truly evil I am. It is not in seeing how much we have sinned. It is not about our sin at all. It is, everything is, about His Holiness.
If we are going out and partying; If we are getting high; If we are sleeping around; If we are living for our next physical pleasure; If we are living for our next false intimacy, it is about our sin. For all that we can think about is our next time to live out that high. Everything becomes about us. What is that next big rush we are living for? Or, what is it that we are going to spend our time crying over, because we cannot get our mind off of whatever it was that we just did? All in all, it remains about us.
But we are called not to live for that next pleasure. We are called to live in His joy. 2 Cor 5:14, "Christ’s love controls us. Since we believe that Christ died for all, we also believe that we have all died to our old life. He died for everyone so that those who receive his new life will no longer live for themselves. Instead, they will live for Christ, who died and was raised for them...This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"
Oswald Chambers, "Being saved and seeing Jesus are not the same thing. Many people who have never seen Jesus have received and share in God’s grace. But once you have seen Him, you can never be the same. Other things will not have the appeal they did before.
You should always recognize the difference between what you see Jesus to be and what He has done for you. If you see only what He has done for you, your God is not big enough. But if you have had a vision, seeing Jesus as He really is, experiences can come and go, yet you will endure “as seeing Him who is invisible” (Hebrews 11:27). The man who was blind from birth did not know who Jesus was until Christ appeared and revealed Himself to him (see John 9). Jesus appears to those for whom He has done something, but we cannot order or predict when He will come. He may appear suddenly, at any turn. Then you can exclaim, “Now I see Him!” (see John 9:25)."
Where is your true heart's focus? What is your true desire? We must look at ourselves with truth, in order to see Him more clearly. If you have truly given your life to Christ, there will be proof of that in the way you live, in your focus for your life. What is your focus? Do you see Him, or do you see your sin?
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Bereft of Shame
Michelangelo's teacher asked him, "Why are you painting nude pictures of people?" Michel's answer, "I want to see man as God sees man." Teacher, "Michel, you are not God."
My husband is a real estate broker and when my oldest son was, I think, 3 years old we went to a house that had a plethora of art. As we were driving up the drive to the house we were greeted with Greek statues. We all went with my husband into the house to look at the house and all that it had. I immediately regretted my decision to join him when we started to walk up the stairs of this amazing home. I was going to try and avoid taking with my son about what he was seeing, but he would not stop. He kept asking me. "Why don't they have any clothes on?" This whole experience was something that I was not prepared for.
Now that several years are passed, I am faced with more of a delima. How do I explain to my son that images on a computer screen of nude people is pornography, but a painting of the same image done by an artist, is art? What is the difference? Some may argue, "It is the intent of the one who is putting that image to paper. If the intent is to arouse sexual pleasure then it is pornography, but if it is to show beauty then it is art." This may be well and fine for the one painting the picture, but what about the others who will view it? Does the one who is painting have no responsibly for my son's response?
When I was in the fourth grade, I stumbled upon some Pent House magazines. What those images did to me as a young girl were enough to start me down a pathway I wish for no one. What is the difference in what we call art and what is pornography? It cannot all be left in the hand of the composer and what their intent was when they designed the "art." We are called to see what we may be doing to others. Even if what we are doing is not wrong in our own hearts and we have a clear conscience about it, we are called not to make others stumble.
I am not saying that we have to live our lives in fear of what everyone else is doing, but art, this one is a big one. For our foundations are being destroyed and our children are hanging in the noose. "When secularism has had its way, we will be left with a society bereft of shame,"(RZ).
When you see a painting of a nude woman, do we think of the heart that was hindered as she was putting herself out for all the artists around her to paint? When you see a woman on the internet, or in Play Boy magazine, do you see what it has done to her? Is there a difference? Those who look at the image in front of them, do they see a difference?
In our world today, I feel like I am fighting a no win battle for my children's eyes and their hearts. Everyone is trying to separate what is art and what is pornography, but how it affect them, how it affects my children, that is the same. When art has had its way, we will be left with a society bereft of shame. From the movies we watch, to the paintings on the wall, our children are standing at the gallows, while the artists paintbrush is dipped in their blood.
My husband is a real estate broker and when my oldest son was, I think, 3 years old we went to a house that had a plethora of art. As we were driving up the drive to the house we were greeted with Greek statues. We all went with my husband into the house to look at the house and all that it had. I immediately regretted my decision to join him when we started to walk up the stairs of this amazing home. I was going to try and avoid taking with my son about what he was seeing, but he would not stop. He kept asking me. "Why don't they have any clothes on?" This whole experience was something that I was not prepared for.
Now that several years are passed, I am faced with more of a delima. How do I explain to my son that images on a computer screen of nude people is pornography, but a painting of the same image done by an artist, is art? What is the difference? Some may argue, "It is the intent of the one who is putting that image to paper. If the intent is to arouse sexual pleasure then it is pornography, but if it is to show beauty then it is art." This may be well and fine for the one painting the picture, but what about the others who will view it? Does the one who is painting have no responsibly for my son's response?
When I was in the fourth grade, I stumbled upon some Pent House magazines. What those images did to me as a young girl were enough to start me down a pathway I wish for no one. What is the difference in what we call art and what is pornography? It cannot all be left in the hand of the composer and what their intent was when they designed the "art." We are called to see what we may be doing to others. Even if what we are doing is not wrong in our own hearts and we have a clear conscience about it, we are called not to make others stumble.
I am not saying that we have to live our lives in fear of what everyone else is doing, but art, this one is a big one. For our foundations are being destroyed and our children are hanging in the noose. "When secularism has had its way, we will be left with a society bereft of shame,"(RZ).
When you see a painting of a nude woman, do we think of the heart that was hindered as she was putting herself out for all the artists around her to paint? When you see a woman on the internet, or in Play Boy magazine, do you see what it has done to her? Is there a difference? Those who look at the image in front of them, do they see a difference?
In our world today, I feel like I am fighting a no win battle for my children's eyes and their hearts. Everyone is trying to separate what is art and what is pornography, but how it affect them, how it affects my children, that is the same. When art has had its way, we will be left with a society bereft of shame. From the movies we watch, to the paintings on the wall, our children are standing at the gallows, while the artists paintbrush is dipped in their blood.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Celebrating the Wrath of God
"Celebrating the Wrath of God," I have just finished reading this book. If you know me, this may surprise you. For you know, I don't read books! I am serious. This is the third book I have read in the last ten years. I don't have the time, but when I do, you must know it is a GOOD one. One of my brothers gave me this book when I was in Texas to see one of my friends for the last time. She died just a couple of days ago. This was my last chance to see her and I knew it. His giving me this book really had nothing to do with why I was in Texas, but it had everything to do with God's timing.
As I was struggling with how I saw her laying in her bed and how good she was, I had many questions. How? Why? But she loved God! How was this living in God's blessing? Isn't He supposed to protect His children? Aren't we supposed to be set apart? Aren't others supposed to see His blessings in us? Isn't that how others are drawn to Him by watching our lives, our blessings? He is supposed to heal us right? Why... Why.... Why? As I was going through the process of watching her die, these were just some of my questions, and at the same time I was reading this book.
For the days that I was with her, I could not read. I could not read until I returned home, for it is hard stuff. The first part of the book is the suffering and in the moment of watching my dear friend, I could not do it. So when I got home and I could focus a little better, I started to read. I laid aside my bible in the early morning, and took up this book. In just a couple of days I was through. I will not talk about what I learned, I am still processing it. I will say that we have a mighty God and I love Him!
One of my favorite parts of the book is a discussion between God and Job. This I will share....
Job: "The way You treated me just lately made it difficult at times to trust in You."
God: "That is interesting, the way you treated Me earlier made it easy for Me to trust in you."
"....And He believes in you. Yes, you who sit nursing your breaking heart that's filled with questions and niggling doubts. You whose pain and anger sometimes spills over into speech that isn't right. You who, because your trouble has been around for years and your prayers for ease have gone unfulfilled, have emotionally given up (and yet here you are reading this)- He believes in you, too."
This is all that I will share. Get the book. Read the book. Then, if you want, we can visit. If you have questions about God's love, all because of the pain you see around you; If you struggle with unanswered questions; If you just cannot see how love and pain can work together, this book is for you. Please read this book......
"To my sweet Daun,
How your life is such a wonderful blessing for me. Thank you for living in love with your God. Thank you for helping me when I did not know I needed your help. Thank you for everything. How I rejoice with you in your new adventure. How I will miss you and your bossy, nosey love....
I love you. Part of your life, saved my life!"
As I was struggling with how I saw her laying in her bed and how good she was, I had many questions. How? Why? But she loved God! How was this living in God's blessing? Isn't He supposed to protect His children? Aren't we supposed to be set apart? Aren't others supposed to see His blessings in us? Isn't that how others are drawn to Him by watching our lives, our blessings? He is supposed to heal us right? Why... Why.... Why? As I was going through the process of watching her die, these were just some of my questions, and at the same time I was reading this book.
For the days that I was with her, I could not read. I could not read until I returned home, for it is hard stuff. The first part of the book is the suffering and in the moment of watching my dear friend, I could not do it. So when I got home and I could focus a little better, I started to read. I laid aside my bible in the early morning, and took up this book. In just a couple of days I was through. I will not talk about what I learned, I am still processing it. I will say that we have a mighty God and I love Him!
One of my favorite parts of the book is a discussion between God and Job. This I will share....
Job: "The way You treated me just lately made it difficult at times to trust in You."
God: "That is interesting, the way you treated Me earlier made it easy for Me to trust in you."
"....And He believes in you. Yes, you who sit nursing your breaking heart that's filled with questions and niggling doubts. You whose pain and anger sometimes spills over into speech that isn't right. You who, because your trouble has been around for years and your prayers for ease have gone unfulfilled, have emotionally given up (and yet here you are reading this)- He believes in you, too."
This is all that I will share. Get the book. Read the book. Then, if you want, we can visit. If you have questions about God's love, all because of the pain you see around you; If you struggle with unanswered questions; If you just cannot see how love and pain can work together, this book is for you. Please read this book......
"To my sweet Daun,
How your life is such a wonderful blessing for me. Thank you for living in love with your God. Thank you for helping me when I did not know I needed your help. Thank you for everything. How I rejoice with you in your new adventure. How I will miss you and your bossy, nosey love....
I love you. Part of your life, saved my life!"
Friday, March 25, 2011
Security even in Death
There are so many things that I was not able to say to you when I was with you. On one hand, in my selfishness, I want you to be healed. I do not want you to go. But on the other, I know you are ready if you do. When I asked you if you were scare, you looked at me with confidence and said, "No, darling not at all." But, death is hard and it is something none of us are truly ready for. It is hard for me, because I am still here without you. But I want to thank you. Thank you for being so faithful. Thank you for giving me peace here. It is only because of your faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ that I can have peace in knowing Whose you are, when you are gone one day.
When my grandmother died, my mom had one regret. I felt that same regret when I left you the other day. Mom's regret was telling her to hold on till the others could get there and that they were coming. Later what she wanted to tell her mother was that she was so excited for her, for she was finally going Home. In my own want, I want to tell you to hold on. In my knowledge of where your destiny is, I want to tell you how excited I am for you if this is your time. You may soon be at true peace. If this is your time, your journey is just now about to begin!
My sweet friend,
Thank you for having your faith. This is all so selfish on my part, but thank you for giving me peace here, now. I can let you go if I have to, and not live in mourning when you do leave. I can do this all because of your faith. If there were no God and you were just gone, that would still be so sad. For then, all that would be left are my memories of you and when I am gone, then you would truly be gone too. If you had not been a believer and there is a God, that would be devastating for me and I would not be able to bear the thought. But, this is not the case at all. You are going Home. And I am so excited for you. When my grandmother died, we did not even really cry. I mean we were sad that we were no longer going to have her here, but we did not grieve her death. We rejoiced with her.
At the same time, I know how powerful our Lord is. I am still holding on to the fact that God could change His mind. "'Remember, LORD, how 'Daun' has walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and has done what is good in your eyes'...This is what the Lord says,'...I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you... I will add fifteen years to your life'" (2 Kings 20) For me now, I am still holding on to the possibility that He can always change His mind. But if by chance, this is the last opportunity that I have, I am so excited for you. Thank you for giving me the wonderful memories that only you and I share. Thank you for helping me when I needed you the most. Most of all thank you for loving Christ, so that I can live here without you. When you do go Home, you will be reunited with your Husband. What wondrous joy. May He heal you. May He give you His peace. May He comfort you. I love you.
When my grandmother died, my mom had one regret. I felt that same regret when I left you the other day. Mom's regret was telling her to hold on till the others could get there and that they were coming. Later what she wanted to tell her mother was that she was so excited for her, for she was finally going Home. In my own want, I want to tell you to hold on. In my knowledge of where your destiny is, I want to tell you how excited I am for you if this is your time. You may soon be at true peace. If this is your time, your journey is just now about to begin!
My sweet friend,
Thank you for having your faith. This is all so selfish on my part, but thank you for giving me peace here, now. I can let you go if I have to, and not live in mourning when you do leave. I can do this all because of your faith. If there were no God and you were just gone, that would still be so sad. For then, all that would be left are my memories of you and when I am gone, then you would truly be gone too. If you had not been a believer and there is a God, that would be devastating for me and I would not be able to bear the thought. But, this is not the case at all. You are going Home. And I am so excited for you. When my grandmother died, we did not even really cry. I mean we were sad that we were no longer going to have her here, but we did not grieve her death. We rejoiced with her.
At the same time, I know how powerful our Lord is. I am still holding on to the fact that God could change His mind. "'Remember, LORD, how 'Daun' has walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and has done what is good in your eyes'...This is what the Lord says,'...I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you... I will add fifteen years to your life'" (2 Kings 20) For me now, I am still holding on to the possibility that He can always change His mind. But if by chance, this is the last opportunity that I have, I am so excited for you. Thank you for giving me the wonderful memories that only you and I share. Thank you for helping me when I needed you the most. Most of all thank you for loving Christ, so that I can live here without you. When you do go Home, you will be reunited with your Husband. What wondrous joy. May He heal you. May He give you His peace. May He comfort you. I love you.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
To My Sweet Daunsie
2 Kings 20:1-6, "In those days Hezekiah became ill and was at the point of death. The prophet Isaiah son of Amoz went to him and said, 'This is what the LORD says: Put your house in order, because you are going to die; you will not recover.' Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the LORD, 'Remember, LORD, how I have walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and have done what is good in your eyes.' And Hezekiah wept bitterly. Before Isaiah had left the middle court, the word of the LORD came to him: 'Go back and tell Hezekiah, the ruler of my people, ‘This is what the LORD, the God of your father David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you. On the third day from now you will go up to the temple of the LORD. I will add fifteen years to your life.'"
To my sweet Daunsie,
I want you to know the good that you have done. I want to tell you how much I love you. As I sat by your bed this weekend, I just could not get out the words that were burning within my heart. Every time that I have ever been with you I have felt like a student at the feet of her teacher. You have loved me with a love of a mother, my entire life. You have gotten in my face, in my space, and been the bossiest woman I have ever known. You are demanding and you speak what is on your mind, no matter what. This I love. I love it because I know you love me. I have always known you love me, because you are so intense with me. I want to thank you for showing me how to love with such passion and enthusiasm.
I so wish that I could have come to more SOS's. I wanted to, so badly, but the 1000 miles between us kept getting in my way! Those young women were blessed more than you will ever know. I know this, for look how much you blessed me. You have done your job very well. You have taken the gifts that you were given and you stretched yourself enough to teach others. Not many women are willing to lay aside their own insecurities and their own wants, in order to step out and help those younger than they are. I think they believe the lies that Satan is feeding them; that they have nothing to share and no one to teach. You did not do this, and I cannot thank you enough.
As I knelt beside you this weekend, I couldn't help but want to draw closer, so I could hear you better. I will stand with you in prayer. Now is the time for those you have loved to stand with you and hold you up to God. Now is the time for us to be strong with you. We will stand by you and pray Hezekiah's prayer with you.
"Remember, LORD, how 'Daun' has walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and has done what is good in your eyes."
"Why did Abraham stop praying when he did? He stopped because he still was lacking the level of intimacy in his relationship with God, which would enable him boldly to continue on with the Lord in prayer until his desire was granted. Whenever we stop short of our true desire in prayer and say, “Well, I don’t know, maybe this is not God’s will,” then we still have another level to go. It shows that we are not as intimately acquainted with God as Jesus was, and as Jesus would have us to be—“ (Oswald Chambers)
When we start to think that anything is too big for God, we must remember that nothing is too big. We stand with you, Daun, in prayer to our God. We ask Him to heal you and to restore you, to your health. We ask Him to give you fifteen more years, so that you can continue to teach those younger than you. Stay strong, sweet woman. Fight against the illness and do what you have to, in order to allow your body to become healthier. Fight against the nausea and eat, even though you do not feel like eating. Drink even though you do not feel like drinking. You do your part and we will do ours. Be strong, my sweet friend, I LOVE YOU....
To my sweet Daunsie,
I want you to know the good that you have done. I want to tell you how much I love you. As I sat by your bed this weekend, I just could not get out the words that were burning within my heart. Every time that I have ever been with you I have felt like a student at the feet of her teacher. You have loved me with a love of a mother, my entire life. You have gotten in my face, in my space, and been the bossiest woman I have ever known. You are demanding and you speak what is on your mind, no matter what. This I love. I love it because I know you love me. I have always known you love me, because you are so intense with me. I want to thank you for showing me how to love with such passion and enthusiasm.
I so wish that I could have come to more SOS's. I wanted to, so badly, but the 1000 miles between us kept getting in my way! Those young women were blessed more than you will ever know. I know this, for look how much you blessed me. You have done your job very well. You have taken the gifts that you were given and you stretched yourself enough to teach others. Not many women are willing to lay aside their own insecurities and their own wants, in order to step out and help those younger than they are. I think they believe the lies that Satan is feeding them; that they have nothing to share and no one to teach. You did not do this, and I cannot thank you enough.
As I knelt beside you this weekend, I couldn't help but want to draw closer, so I could hear you better. I will stand with you in prayer. Now is the time for those you have loved to stand with you and hold you up to God. Now is the time for us to be strong with you. We will stand by you and pray Hezekiah's prayer with you.
"Remember, LORD, how 'Daun' has walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and has done what is good in your eyes."
"Why did Abraham stop praying when he did? He stopped because he still was lacking the level of intimacy in his relationship with God, which would enable him boldly to continue on with the Lord in prayer until his desire was granted. Whenever we stop short of our true desire in prayer and say, “Well, I don’t know, maybe this is not God’s will,” then we still have another level to go. It shows that we are not as intimately acquainted with God as Jesus was, and as Jesus would have us to be—“ (Oswald Chambers)
When we start to think that anything is too big for God, we must remember that nothing is too big. We stand with you, Daun, in prayer to our God. We ask Him to heal you and to restore you, to your health. We ask Him to give you fifteen more years, so that you can continue to teach those younger than you. Stay strong, sweet woman. Fight against the illness and do what you have to, in order to allow your body to become healthier. Fight against the nausea and eat, even though you do not feel like eating. Drink even though you do not feel like drinking. You do your part and we will do ours. Be strong, my sweet friend, I LOVE YOU....
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Chasing Rabbits
"'As they followed they were afraid' —Mark 10:32
At the beginning of our life with Jesus Christ, we were sure we knew all there was to know about following Him. It was a delight to forsake everything else and to throw ourselves before Him in a fearless statement of love. But now we are not quite so sure. Jesus is far ahead of us and is beginning to seem different and unfamiliar— 'Jesus was going before them; and they were amazed' (Mark 10:32).
There is an aspect of Jesus that chills even a disciple’s heart to its depth and makes his entire spiritual life gasp for air. This unusual Person with His face set 'like a flint' (Isaiah 50:7) is walking with great determination ahead of me, and He strikes terror right through me. He no longer seems to be my Counselor and Friend and has a point of view about which I know nothing. All I can do is stand and stare at Him in amazement. At first I was confident that I understood Him, but now I am not so sure. I begin to realize that there is a distance between Jesus and me and I can no longer be intimate with Him. I have no idea where He is going, and the goal has become strangely distant.
Jesus Christ had to understand fully every sin and sorrow that human beings could experience, and that is what makes Him seem unfamiliar. When we see this aspect of Him, we realize we really don’t know Him. We don’t recognize even one characteristic of His life, and we don’t know how to begin to follow Him. He is far ahead of us, a Leader who seems totally unfamiliar, and we have no friendship with Him.
The discipline of dismay is an essential lesson which a disciple must learn. The danger is that we tend to look back on our times of obedience and on our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for Him strong (see Isaiah 1:10-11). But when the darkness of dismay comes, endure until it is over, because out of it will come the ability to follow Jesus truly, which brings inexpressibly wonderful joy." (Oswald Chambers)
This is where I am currently. Many times though this new journey with Christ, I have been very confident in where He was taking me. Then other times, like now, I can become very insecure. Just the other day I was in Ouray with my family and had to step away from them in order to have some quiet so that I could set the day in focus. (I must start my day with Christ, otherwise I can be a monster.) I separated myself and went and sat on a bridge overlooking the river. I sat there and begged God to show me. Show me where I am supposed to go and what I was supposed to do next. "Please God, help me. I do not want to be chasing rabbits down a rabbit hole and miss what I have right in front of me. I do not want to be spending all this energy and time on something that is just leading me astray from what is truly important. I do not want to be striving for something that is not going to do anything, but to draw my attention away from my family. Help me to keep focus. Do not let me loose relationship with them and with You while I travel this path. Help me keep the moment in front of me as my focus while I try my best to obey You in the everyday."
Stepping out in obedience can be some of the hardest and most insecure times in our life. I do not want to look like a fool. I do not want to miss what God really has for me. I do not want to chase rabbits down a rabbit hole. I do not want to disobey, while trying to obey. It can become very confusing.
Then God sends me Oswald and I can hear Him speaking to me.... "Wait. Be patient. Just keep today as your focus and do your best today. You are not here to conquer the world. You are here to enjoy and have peace in this moment. You are here to love those I have given you. Tomorrow will take care of tomorrow. Work when I tell you to work and rest when I tell you to rest. Nothing may happen in others eyes, but you will be able to see Me more clearly. Show your children, today, how much I love them. Show your husband, today, how much I love him. It is in the moment that you will find My peace and love. I will take care of the big picture. You take care of the moment, while you walk in obedience to Me, today."
At the beginning of our life with Jesus Christ, we were sure we knew all there was to know about following Him. It was a delight to forsake everything else and to throw ourselves before Him in a fearless statement of love. But now we are not quite so sure. Jesus is far ahead of us and is beginning to seem different and unfamiliar— 'Jesus was going before them; and they were amazed' (Mark 10:32).
There is an aspect of Jesus that chills even a disciple’s heart to its depth and makes his entire spiritual life gasp for air. This unusual Person with His face set 'like a flint' (Isaiah 50:7) is walking with great determination ahead of me, and He strikes terror right through me. He no longer seems to be my Counselor and Friend and has a point of view about which I know nothing. All I can do is stand and stare at Him in amazement. At first I was confident that I understood Him, but now I am not so sure. I begin to realize that there is a distance between Jesus and me and I can no longer be intimate with Him. I have no idea where He is going, and the goal has become strangely distant.
Jesus Christ had to understand fully every sin and sorrow that human beings could experience, and that is what makes Him seem unfamiliar. When we see this aspect of Him, we realize we really don’t know Him. We don’t recognize even one characteristic of His life, and we don’t know how to begin to follow Him. He is far ahead of us, a Leader who seems totally unfamiliar, and we have no friendship with Him.
The discipline of dismay is an essential lesson which a disciple must learn. The danger is that we tend to look back on our times of obedience and on our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for Him strong (see Isaiah 1:10-11). But when the darkness of dismay comes, endure until it is over, because out of it will come the ability to follow Jesus truly, which brings inexpressibly wonderful joy." (Oswald Chambers)
This is where I am currently. Many times though this new journey with Christ, I have been very confident in where He was taking me. Then other times, like now, I can become very insecure. Just the other day I was in Ouray with my family and had to step away from them in order to have some quiet so that I could set the day in focus. (I must start my day with Christ, otherwise I can be a monster.) I separated myself and went and sat on a bridge overlooking the river. I sat there and begged God to show me. Show me where I am supposed to go and what I was supposed to do next. "Please God, help me. I do not want to be chasing rabbits down a rabbit hole and miss what I have right in front of me. I do not want to be spending all this energy and time on something that is just leading me astray from what is truly important. I do not want to be striving for something that is not going to do anything, but to draw my attention away from my family. Help me to keep focus. Do not let me loose relationship with them and with You while I travel this path. Help me keep the moment in front of me as my focus while I try my best to obey You in the everyday."
Stepping out in obedience can be some of the hardest and most insecure times in our life. I do not want to look like a fool. I do not want to miss what God really has for me. I do not want to chase rabbits down a rabbit hole. I do not want to disobey, while trying to obey. It can become very confusing.
Then God sends me Oswald and I can hear Him speaking to me.... "Wait. Be patient. Just keep today as your focus and do your best today. You are not here to conquer the world. You are here to enjoy and have peace in this moment. You are here to love those I have given you. Tomorrow will take care of tomorrow. Work when I tell you to work and rest when I tell you to rest. Nothing may happen in others eyes, but you will be able to see Me more clearly. Show your children, today, how much I love them. Show your husband, today, how much I love him. It is in the moment that you will find My peace and love. I will take care of the big picture. You take care of the moment, while you walk in obedience to Me, today."
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