Husbands Wives

I was reading 1 Peter 3:1-7. This talks about husbands and wives. Two main passages stood out to me, one for husbands and one for wives. Many women get very tense when talking about their role as a wife. I can understand this, it is in self defense. You want to protect your rights. But this is what it says to wives, "In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands, even those who refuse to accept the Good News. Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words. They will be won over by watching your pure, godly behavior." I used to think that if your husband was living in sin and refused to change, then you needed to get out. You have the right to leave. This says something different, it says to stay and continue living a godly life, so that he may be won over. You cannot preach to them, you must show them with your love. Your changed life will be an example and they will follow. It never says that it will happen in the timing that you desire. It just says to do it. It may take your whole life. Isn't his soul worth that? Christ gave his life for you. What is your life when you are talking about his soul?

Husbands, now this needs to be emphasized more often, "In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat her with understanding as you live together...she is your equal partner in God's gift of new life. If you don't treat her as you should, your prayers will not be heard." Husbands your prayers will not be heard if you do not treat your wives as you should. Now this is big. How many times does it say that God will not listen to you? He listens and cares for you and tries to help you all of the time. This is huge. Treating your wife as you should is a very strong command, "your prayers will not be heard" if you don't!

"A man who honors his wife will protect, respect, help and stay with her. He will lighten her load wherever he can. He will be sensitive to her needs, and he will relate to her with courtesy, consideration, insight, and tact. If a man is not considerate and respectful of his wife, his prayers will not be heard, because a living relationship with God depends on right relationships with others...If men use their position to mistreat their wives, their prayers will not be heard." This is from the commentary on this passage.

It is equal. Wives respect and honor your husbands. Live with them so that they may be won over and their souls saved. Husbands honor and treat your wives lovingly, so that your prayers will be heard.

I am so thankful that my husband, now, is a good and caring man. He treats me to the best of his ability, the way that Christ treated his followers. He is kind and helpful. I try my best to be the kind of woman that God instructs me to be. I try to be the helper that my husband needs. In saying all of this, I have so many regrets. I failed at my previous marriage. It was my role as helper, to help my husband. I only fed his weakness. I have a great life and husband now. But, this does not relieve the burden that I feel in leaving my ex husband, in a life of sin. I can only pray that he found God and a stronger woman, than I was, to help him on his journey.

Your life can be just fine; it can be wonderful, even after divorce. But, with divorce there are so many regrets. I failed as a wife. I cannot look only at my failures, but I can learn from them, and be determined to do better now and in the future. I cannot concentrate on the past, but I can look forward to the goal for which Christ is calling me heavenward. Be the best wife you can be, no matter what your husband is doing. If you can stay spiritually strong in the marriage, if you can stay in love with your Lord, if you will not lose your salvation by staying married, then stay in the marriage. Your husbands soul is worth it. Be the best husband that you can be. Help your wife for her day is full. Your work day does not end at 5pm, but it only begins. As a team the burden is lighter for both, alone it is so heavy. Embrace one another, be thankful and always pray for God's guidance and strength. Both of your souls are worth it.